No Matter How I Look At It, It's Still You Girls' Fault
by Big Diesel
Summary: Just when you think Lincoln already had a handful of his crazy harem. Now, he is faced with a new challenge, dealing with the side stories that don't relate in no way, shape, or form to the plot. Join Lincoln, Willow, Sam, Chloe, Rita, Luna, Nory, and the others as they tackle the comedic side of their life and the misadventures that they bring in these random side stories. [AU]
1. Willow vs the Redbox Machine

**Welcome to** ** _No Matter How I Look At It, It Is Still You Girls' Fault._** **This anthology features characters from the** ** _It's You Girls' Fault For These Random Moments._** **However, the stories featured in this series relate to the plot none whatsoever. This series, or side stories, will serve as comic relief. The misadventures of Lincoln continues with his crazy harem. That way, it separates from the plot and hopefully, you guys enjoy this series.**

 **As a precaution, this series is a complete work of fiction. I don't condone, endorse, support, and/or encourage any of the actions portrayed here. If you guys can deviate fiction from reality, then feel free to read.**

 **As a reminder,** ** _No Matter How I Look At It, It Is Still You Girls' Fault_** **will serve as side stories from the main storyline. Chapters in this series don't relate to the plot. It just serves as comic relief. So, lots of fun, error, and misadventures within this series. I hope you enjoy. Thanks, Happy Reading, and God bless!**

* * *

It doesn't take long for the queen of the night to become easily frustrated. She can't help it. She has a quick, short temper and is ready to attack at will. However, since making her acquaintance with Lincoln, she is learning to calm down. She is even reading books on managing her anger. Speaking of anger management, she is dealing with a task at hand. It is a task that she never thought she had to deal with. She has prayed to the gods for hundreds of years of performing something so agonizing, so painstaking that she has said to give her the stake so she can end herself.

"Willow, you are starting to hurt me." Willow returns from her mind, a place she is normally used to residing in her thoughts. Willow and Lincoln are sitting in his parents' van in front of the local pharmacy. Standing before them is the challenge at hand.

Willow turns to Lincoln, holding his hand in a pleading position. "Please, Lincoln. I never thought in my many years of my undead heart of this task." She grabs his hand tighter. "I will give you an off day. I will let you have a one-time opportunity of dominating me." She widens her eyes, her hands trembling at the task in front of her. It is glowing red like her eyes. It shines brightly on the car that they have taken without permission. Thankfully, Willow hypnotized them. They should be out for quite a while.

"Willow, relax," says Lincoln, giving her a kiss on the hand. Willow is happy with Lincoln's support. She returns his kiss by doing the same with his hand, followed by rubbing his hair. "We have practiced. We have trained. We even did some simulations with this."

"The simulations were horrible," interjects Willow. "It was so real that it was very scary." She turns to him once more. "Lincoln, you know I am not a beggar. I gave you two of my choices and you damn well know it hurts me to the core for not ravishing you. Please, Lincoln, please."

Lincoln keeps his composure. He is very determined on the task Willow has to do. "Willow, do you trust me?"

She looks awestruck by the question, let alone the response. "Do I trust you?"

"Of course, do you trust me?"

"Of course, I do. To some extent."

"Do you care about me?"

"Yes. You know I love you. You are my blood doll."

"Have I let you gone astray. Have I ran from anything of the things you have done to me?"

"No."

"Have I ran from the times you have bitten me?"

"No."

"Won't admit it to myself, but have I ran from the forced sex we had every now and again?"

"No," she sways her hair. "Even if it was "forced," you enjoyed it in the end."

"Then, you should trust me. You are going to let something like that scare you?"

Willow looks at the challenge right in front of her. Once again, if someone gives her a stake, she will end herself. Right in front of her is the horrible, painstaking Redbox machine.

The fallacy of being a technophobe.

"It is saying that I am such a failure, Lincoln," she tells Willow. "There is no way I can check out a DVD from that machine. Is there a video store close by?"

He tries to hold his laughter without angering the queen of the night. "There isn't, Willow. How about this. I will come out of the car and I will assist you. And by I mean assist, I will tell you what to do."

She lets out a loud sigh, followed by a slight pout. "Fine." She opens the door and slams it loudly. She furrows her eyes at Lincoln. "You know after the movie, I am going to…."

He looks away. "I know, I know. My neck and my body is ready."

"It better be," she tells him with sternness.

The duo stands beside the Redbox machine. Lincoln urges Willow to walk forward.

"Are you ready," asks Lincoln.

She takes steady breaths. "I can do this. I can do this. I have battled with lions and executioners. I can handle a machine." She turns to Lincoln. "My instructions?"

"Okay, the first thing you need to do is browse what kind of movie you want to watch."

"Movie got it!" She puts her finger to her lip. As she is scrolling on the screen, something hit her mind. "What kind of movie can we watch?" She turns to her blood doll. "Have we decide on a movie?"

"Um, whatever you want, dear."

"I think we should get something we can agree on."

"Are you sure? I even doubt we will finish it because of your quickness in sex."

She furrows her eyebrows. "Are you getting smart with me?"

He shakes his head in disagreement. "No, ma'am. You know I won't ever do that."

"Just make sure. I love you very, very much. But, you know how I easily I can take my rage." She winks at him. "You, too, is not an exception."

Lincoln doesn't need the reminder for the claws on his back is a reminder. He makes a promise to never question Willow on who is the better actress in a vampire movie. Even though he believes Kirsten Dunst played a better role than Kristen Stewart.

"Pick an Adam Sandler movie if they have that," suggests Lincoln.

Her eyes widen in excitement. "Can we get Billy Madison?"

"Yeah, we can. Do you see it?"

Willow looks in confusion. She keeps touching the screen. Each press gets harder and harder. Lincoln becomes concerned.

"Willow, calm down. I can help you find…."

It is too late. Willow wraps her fist and punches the screen. She pounces on it a couple of times before kicking the machine in. A few people from the parking lot displays concern. One of which pulls out a cell phone.

"Willow, we have to go. I don't, I mean, we don't need to explain to the cops about this. Especially if you are a vampire."

Willow remains standing in position. Not wanting to face the police, Lincoln grabs Willows by the shoulder. Willow displays a furious look to Lincoln. "You, blood doll. Must feed! Must breed!" She drags Lincoln away until they are far enough for her to fly away to her domain.

As he is flying to another night of not so gentle biting and rough, ravishing sex, he kept a smile on his face.

 _Of course, she is going to take advantage of me. Of course, she is not going to let me live this down. However, I am proud of her. The last time we were at a Redbox, she bust the windshield of that car she stole from that random person. So, her clicking on the screen is progress. Maybe next time. Maybe next time. God, this is going to be harder than I thought._


	2. Nory Wonders Why Lincoln Reads Yuri

_**Here is a side story featuring our favorite hikikomori Nory (also the notorious, devilish monster, Ayna). Whereas Willow was challenging a Redbox, Nory is being challenged with something more than a DVD machine. Find out in the latest No Matter How I Look At It, It's Still You Girls' Fault.**_

As if the floodgates were released from heaven, the rambunctious schoolchildren flooded the hallways, throwing and scrambling the papers of the school week in a confetti of past memories. It wasn't summer vacation. It wasn't spring break for it wasn't for another few weeks. This was the typical norm of the weekend. The two days were to be filled with no school, no books, and no dirty looks from the teacher. Lincoln used the word, _dirty_ , in a different meaning. Before leaving school, Nurse Kazami gave him a list of _assignments_ to work on for the weekend.

 _Nurse Kazami's Assignment for Lincoln Loud_

 _Take a picture of your dick and send it to me before going to bed this evening._

 _Send a video of your dick and send it to me before going to bed this evening._

 _Take a video massaging your dick and send it to me before Sunday evening._

 _Expand your "area" for our cleansing during PE (you will get an excuse, don't worry XD)._

 _Eat a peach so you can practice on eating out Tomoko (As much she enjoys my tongue, she wants something rougher ;))_

 _Have this list complete before arriving at school on Monday and there is a special prize for you._

 _Dance of the Vampire Bund_ is the newest manga Lincoln got involved with. It was the limited edition of the original copy with an autograph from the artist. If these tasks were to be completed, then he would received the prize. Despite his strong willpower and pride, this was an autographed limited edition.

"For the Vampire Bund," he said aloud as he closed his locker. Per usual, he was one of the last people to leave the campus. However, he wasn't alone. For Nory was waiting beside him, leaning against another locker. Nory carried her books with her tender, recently manicured hands. She has began wearing contacts, which gave her a much revealing look. Even her style of clothes have changed. No longer wearing the traditional Chechen attire or the homely schoolgirl look, she was sporting blue jean capris that were tightly wrapped around her legs. She was wearing a yellow blouse that she partially unbuttoned, displaying her goods. She has recently gone to a hair stylist where she had her frizzy black hair straighten, but has her bangs covering her eyes. She was going for the _Mysterious Girlfriend X_ 's Mikoto Urabe look. As Lincoln was thinking about her appearance, he remembered that the reason she was staying behind because he had promised her to go to the bookstore after school. Her crystal blue eyes were gorgeous. It made Lincoln happy that no longer she was hiding behind herself. He was watching her glowing, growing aura and was very happy for her.

He turned to Nory whereas she smiled and took the list away from Lincoln as they walked hand-in-hand toward the outside of the school. One of Nory's new rules: when they are together, they are to be holding hands. Lincoln didn't go against the status quo for they were a couple in this crazy harem.

"The nurse better be lucky you are okay with this, or else, I would have gone to the police with this." She spat, wanting to tear the paper she had the misfortune to read. However, she knew that in order to keep Lincoln happy, not to disturb the dynamic of the harem, for now. Brewing within the former hikikomori lies a beast, waiting for the day to release herself to world; wreaking havoc to those who dare test the real Ayna Shishani. She made a mental note to have Nurse Kazami and Chloe Molyneaux personality on her "no kill, but torture list" once she had totally conquered Lincoln. As for her sister, Willow, that was another story. For now, she was on a date with Lincoln and she was to soak in every moment. The basking, warm sun also help so she can soak up its' rays.

"Nowadays, I can't trust the police," said Lincoln. "Last week, I was walking to Magnolia's and a cop stopped me. Random stop, frisk, and search." He laughed. It turned out that the cop was connected with Miki and her wife, Haruka. Lately, I haven't been around them and it worried them. So, they hired a cop to watch over me. He shook his head. "I will have a police escort to their cabin on Sunday."

Nory laughed. "You have a handful, Linky." She gripped it tighter. "Just make sure that today is for me and me only, you hear?" She shoved her shoulder against him. "Plus, don't bother thinking about going home. You are spending the night with me. We can order pizza."

"I am sick of pizza," interjected Lincoln. "Can we get some Greek or Chinese instead."

"That is fine, senpai," she said with her glowing smile. "Anything to make you happy."

"Sometimes, I wish you dropped that hikikomori act," said Lincoln. "You don't have to pretend anymore."

"Who says that is pretend," questioned Nory. "Remember how multi-faceted I can be. Capiche?"

Lincoln didn't answer, but kissed her cheek in confirmation of her question. They let go of their hands when they arrived at the bus stop. Lincoln was reading the latest edition of _Girl Friends_ and Nory was reading her favorite manga, _Aki Sora._ While Lincoln was reading quietly, Nory raised her eyebrows to the surprisement of Lincoln's reading _yuri_ manga. She wasn't judging for she, too, invested another girls' love, but out of perverted reasons instead of romantic reasons. She continued glancing the scenery of two teenage girls finding themselves through forbidden love of the same sex. She awed at the brief moments before seeing the bus arrived.

It was Nory's decision to go to the bookstore. There was a _Chobits_ and a _Chibi Vampire_ manga she wanted to purchase. Lincoln was fine for he wanted to check out some manga to purchase himself.

A few moments later, the bus stopped at the corner. Lincoln grabbed Nory's head and they stepped off of the bus. The bookstore was about a block away. By the time they arrived to the bookstore, the patrons of the evening were filling the spots. The bookstore also had a coffeehouse. Most of the patrons were in the coffeehouse. The fresh aroma of coffee entered the vicinity, leaving them with a taste for some hot chocolate.

"Do you want to get coffee here instead of Magnolia's today," asked Nory.

"Yeah, why not kill two birds with one stone," confirmed Lincoln.

"Do you want to go to the manga section," asked Nory.

"As always, my dear _kouhai_." Lincoln winked at Nory, in return made the former hikikomori blush. They held hands, passing through an elderly couple before heading toward the manga aisle.

Lincoln and Nory splitted, for Nory already called the bookstore in advance to find her location of her books. As she find the areas of her manga, she couldn't help but to watch Lincoln. Lincoln was looking at a selection of books. They were all in the _yuri_ category. Lincoln find a couple of books in particular before sitting on the floor.

As she planned to go to his direction, she stopped when seeing a couple coming to Lincoln. She saw them earlier when entering the store. She frowned when recognizing one of them.

"That is the Miki girl," she furrowed her eyebrow, biting her lip. "Why in the hell does she come here and has the fucking nerve to bring her bitch with her?" She said in her quiet voice. If anyone would've paid her attention, they would have noticed the change of eye color and the growth of her nails. She gripped her manga books tightly, keeping herself hidden to peek on the wedded lesbian couple.

"Howdy, stranger." Lincoln looked up to see the beautiful brunette, Miki, and her wife, the tomboyish blonde, Haruki standing before him. They were close, holding each other's hips. Miki kneeled down to Lincoln, rubbing his forehead and taking the book he was reading.

She smiled, looking into her lover's eye. "Seems like our Linky is curious about girls' love, Haru."

Haruka covered her lips while chuckling. "It doesn't surprise me, my princess. Lincoln, here, has always been courageous on exploring our spectrum." She decided to kneel down and sit beside Lincoln.

"What book is this, dear," she asked Lincoln, keeping one of her hands on his shoulder. Haruka joined Miki by putting her hands on his shoulder.

Meanwhile, Nory watched, wanting to terminate the lesbians on sight. However, she was in a public place. At the same, she didn't want to do anything to hurt Lincoln. Despite her devilish pride, she must maintain her composure until the lesbians made their leave.

"It is called _Aoi Hana,_ but it is called _Sweet Blue Flowers_ in English," he told the women. "It is a coming of age manga. It is about a girl who is seeking love. I think she has a crush on her cousin, but is upset when learning her cousin is marrying a guy. From what I have read so far, they had a relationship. Or at least having sex."

Haruka pressed her shoulders to Lincoln, hovering over him while looking at the book. "Girls' love is a beautiful thing, Lincoln. Men won't be able to appreciate it for they think these girls do these things to please men." She pursed her lips. "It is beautiful, delicate. Like a rosebud that needs tender, love, and care from a gardener."

Miki interjected the conversation. "Or beautiful music that takes time and practice."

Haruka narrowed her eyes. "Poetry written with the finest of lines, the finest of notes. Delicate it is, my dearest princess. My dearest Linky."

"Seeing forbidden love before your very eyes. Seeing their hands intertwine with one another, tasting each other's love, thoughts, feelings. Everything filled with the brink of passion," said Miki. She blew into his ear. "Something men don't understand, my dear Linky."

"Don't fret, my love. Linky is different," said Haruka. "He is loving, compassionate. He is very aware of our feelings." She chuckled. "It makes me think he is a lesbian, but with a penis."

"A lesbian," retorted Lincoln.

Miki purred. "Yes, a lesbian. You are such a delicate creature. So soft, tender to the touch." She swayed his hair. "Soft, pleasant hair. Beautiful eyes. So feminine in many ways."

"Submissive," interjected Haruka.

"That he is," said Miki. "But, he can be quite a beast when I am in the mood for a man." She winked at Lincoln.

"Miki, Haruka," said Lincoln.

"What is it, dear," asked Haruka.

"As much we can have this embarrassing, let alone in public, conversation, I am actually with someone," said Lincoln while closing his book. He grabbed both of their chins with each hands, which raised their eyebrows. "We should talk about this behind closed doors and when we are alone. Also, I don't want to be rude to my guest, wherever she is." He handed his book to Miki, displaying his alluring eyes. "If you want me to be submissive, would you buy this for me, darling." Miki's eyes widened when he blew his breath into her mouth.

Miki took the book from Lincoln. "Of course, my precious darling. Anything for you." She turned to Haruka. "Let's go, dear. We have things to do." She turned to Lincoln. "We will have this book when you come over, okay?"

"Ok," said Lincoln. "Take care, Miki and Haruka."

The ladies blew kisses and left the vicinity. Meanwhile, Nory wiped the sweat from her forehead and sat down, holding on to her books. "The power of influence is a beautiful thing. It has been quite a while to use those powers, but whatever I can do to get those skanks away from my Linky." She thought of Miki with horrendous thoughts. _Did fucking up your ride wasn't enough for you? Seems like I will have to do worse._

Nory cracked her neck followed by her knuckles. She peered from the corner and returned to Lincoln. "Hey, senpai."

Lincoln was rubbing his forehead when seeing the former hikikomori. "Oh, hey Nory. Man, I have a headache."

"What is wrong. Was there _some things_ irritating you?"

"I don't know. Earlier, I was talking to Ms. Miki and her wife. Then, they were gone."

"Oh, like _Gone With The Wind_?"

"More like _Saved By the Bell_."

"Or _Pushing Daisies._ "

"Ha! That is very funny, Nory."

"I am catching on with your crazy idioms about things," she grinned. "I am happy they can no longer interfere with our date."

"Yeah, agreed." He stared on to her. "Did you get your books?"

She displayed her peace sign. "Got them!"

"Amazing how you shift from one thing to the next in personality."

She stuck her tongue out. "Bleh! And back at you! I see the _yuri_ manga you are reading. Those girls pulled you in, Miki and Haruka?"

He shook his head. "No, of course, not!" He scoffed. "If anything, those girls and their parlor games they play with me, I should turn away from it."

"Then, why did you began reading it?"

"Why do you read it," he questioned interjectedly.

"You should know that I am perverted. I get off to anything." She sat beside him and pressed her body next to him. "Seriously, senpai. Why do you read them?"

He turned to her. "Promise to keep this a secret?"

She displayed her sign of the cross. "Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a dirty, AIDS needle in my eye."

He picked up one of the manga books and held it across his chest. "I read it out of pure envy." He sighed. "I become jealous of girls that date one another. It makes me feel fallible, incompetent."

Nory put her hands to her cheek. "Fallible? Incompetent?"

"Yeah. I know this is silly and kind of stupid, but I get jealous," said Lincoln. "Gay, lesbian, transgender, bisexual, all of them deserve love. I mean, I am seeing Sam and she is dating my sister. I am having a relationship with Miki and she is married to a woman. There is Tomoko and Nurse Kazami, but I don't think it counts. For the relationship is more out of control than love. Nurse Kazami is mostly straight, but Tomoko is bisexual. I just don't think she is ready to accept that. Anyway, I often wish I was a girl. That is why I picture myself being one of the girls. It makes me feel that I can be useful." He looked to Nory. "Call me crazy. That is how I feel."

She shook her head. "No, you are not crazy. We want to be useful. I get that feeling with _yaoi._ A beautiful man coveted by another man. It isn't me in that position. I get jealous too. I think you are not the only one who feels that way. Call it pride. Call it arrogance, but I don't know." She put her arms around Lincoln. "Love is confusing, senpai. I think it is somewhere we just find a person to attract, regardless of gender or race or any creed. Love has no boundaries." She rubbed her nose into his neck. "We should learn not to overthink things. Appreciate what they are, learn from them, and make those happy in any way you can." She kissed his neck, causing him to shake. His breath began to labor.

"Nory, this is not the place…." She put her finger to his lip.

"Shh! I know, Lincoln." She pecked him on the lips. "Don't ever feel you are inferior." She gave him another peck. "Okay?"

"Okay!"

"Good! Let's purchase these books and get out of here, senpai."

"What about the drinks?"

"Damn the drinks. I am in the mood," she said before putting her hands in his pocket. "Grandma won't be home tonight. It is bingo night. There is something I want to do with you. To help you with your insecurity."

Lincoln purchased he and Nory's books. They left the bookstore and waited for the next bus to take them back to Nory's apartment. Lincoln phoned his mother and told her that he was spending the night with Rusty Spokes. He could hear it in her breath that he was lying, but she wanted to have a word with him when he got home. While hanging up the phone, Nory slept on his shoulder. He kept a tight grip on her as they were arriving to his apartment.

It was a quarter after seven in the evening when the bus dropped the teenagers to her apartment. Lincoln knew that Luna and Sam were in Atlantic City with Sam's family. Although the Silver Porsche was there, she wasn't. It must have registered into Nory's mind as she "accidentally" spat on the windshield while walking to the apartment.

Darkness surrounded the apartment upon unlocking the door. The smell of thyme, spicy seasonings, and her grandmother's hinglash filled the room. The moment Lincoln closed the door, Nory pushed him against the door wrapping her lips around the stunned Lincoln. Lincoln, instinctively, returned her kiss, combating their tongues for which one would give first. The pair walked backwards, talking off each other's shirt in the process.

They took moments in between to capture their breaths. Lincoln tried to make it to the bedroom, but Nory pulled him to the couch.

"I think we aren't going to make it this time, Linky," she purred. Lincoln watched as she took off her shorts, exposing her pink panties. Lincoln basked in the scent of her womanhood looming upon him. Along with it was the fresh baby powder scent. Nory was really taking care of herself, he thought. She reached for his pants, unbuttoning them, taking sharp breaths as she pulled them off of him.

She put her hands around his boxers, pressing his testicles. He took sharp breaths.

"Easy, easy," she interjected. "You will be fine. Just relax for me."

Lincoln allowed Nory to take over and do her bidding. She pulled down his boxers, where she saw his penis. However, she was surprised that he wasn't getting hard. She played coy, gripping his dick, but it was to no avail. She sort of frown of the surprise.

"Are you okay, Linc," she said.

"Sorry, Nory," he said. "For some reason, I still can't get it out of my mind."

"Was it something I did?"

He shook his head. "No, no. I liked what you did. I just can't get _it_ out of my mind."

Nory registered immediately his _it._ "Oh! Okay." She got from Lincoln and sat on the couch. There was a pregnant silence, as both were sitting in the darkness. Through the lights of the blinds, he saw her resting her chin on her hands.

"Are you okay, Nory? Sorry if I…."

She wavered her hands. "No, no. Just let me think."

Nory looked to the ceiling. She took short breaths, cracking her knuckles in the process. She stood up and faced Lincoln. "Let's go to my bedroom, shall we? I think I can remedy this." She extended her hands to Lincoln. "Come with me, my darling."

As a precaution, Lincoln, first, picked up their clothes, in case if her grandmother came home. They continued walking, hand in hand, to her bedroom. She was the last to close the door, locking it in the process.

"Sit on the bed," she told Lincoln.

Lincoln sat on the bed while Nory went to her drawer. She pushed aside her sex toys and her lingerie she reserved on their _special days_. Tonight was no exception, for she has yet to have those moments. She was saving them for the day she could finally claim Lincoln, for herself. As of now, she was okay with sharing, but it was only a matter of time before she wanted Lincoln and him alone. So, until then, the lingerie was in reserved for that day. She reached for the item she had in mind.

Lincoln watched her pull the material and put it on top of the drawer. "I think this should work," she told herself. "This should work perfectly."

Nory returned to Lincoln's sight with a hand of clothes. "These clothes should fit you. Go in the closet and try them on."

"What are they," questioned Lincoln for it was too dark to see them.

"Don't worry about it," said Nory. "I think it will help you. So do it, for me."

"Okay," answered Lincoln. He took the clothes from Nory and walked into the closet.

Lincoln entered her walk-in closet and turned on the light. His eyes widened in disbelief when seeing the attire. It was a thin t-shirt and a pair of white panties. _What is Nory thinking? Has the perversion gone to her brain? What a minute, that is a compliment._

"It shouldn't take long to put it on, senpai."

"In a minute," he said. Lincoln swallowed his pride and took off his boxers. He put on her t-shirt and her pair of panties.

They were a perfect fit.

He stepped out of the closet. "Ok, Nory. I have it on and I must say I look kind of…" He paused, stunned at the sight beholding him."

Elizabeth Daily's "Please Send Me Someone to Love" blared in the stereo system. Candles were lighting around the room. It gave Lincoln a hint of lavender. He saw as Nory wearing a matching outfit. She kept her arms behind her back, blushing in the shadows. The moonlight was in perfect position, displaying her ominous beauty.

She extended her arms. "Come to me." As if she whispered a prayer, Lincoln walked into her arms. Her buxom touched his chest, feeling her erect nipples. She pressed her body, resting her head on his shoulders. She drifted her hands to his hips. In return, he complied to doing the same thing.

"Don't talk. Just dance with me."

 _Heaven please send to all mankind_

 _Understanding and peace of mind_

 _And if it's not asking too much_

 _Please send me someone to love_

Nory pressed her lips to his collarbone, applying her tongue to his skin. He moaned in ecstasy, gripping her harder in the process.

 _Show the world how to get along_

 _Peace will enter when hate is gone_

 _So if it's not askin' too much_

 _Please send me someone to love_

Lincoln gripped his palm onto her ass, grabbing it tightly, causing Nory to bite into his neck. The bite intensified his pleasure, prompting him to grab her ass more.

 _Just because I'm in misery_

 _I don't beg for no sympathy_

 _And if it's not askin' too much_

 _Please send me someone to love_

Their eyes met, both blushing as if they were bride and groom. In a way, the setting was met like it was a honeymoon.

"Lincoln," she said. "You look very beautiful." She kissed him on his cheek. "You are beautiful. I love you."

Lincoln froze when hearing the latter words coming from her lips. However, his erection confirmed his feelings. "I-I-I love you, too, Nory." He sighed loudly. "I love you."

"Kiss me, my princess."

Lincoln didn't care what she called him for this night, he was going to be her princess. Her tongue swiped his lip as it enter, exploring whatever confines he had within. Lincoln felt like he was on fire, trying his best contain his erection.

She broke the kiss. She released herself from him and reached for something from the dresser. In her hand was a white wig. He recognized it during the time when they did cosplay sex with _Harry Potter._ It didn't take much of a genius which one played the role of a Slytherin.

Lincoln nodded his head, allowing her to put on the wig like a king is donning the queen to her title. She released a smile, showing her compassion while swaying his hair. "Let's go to the bed, _Linka_."

Lincoln went to the bed. She instructed him to lie there. She also told him to take off his t-shirt, but keep his panties on. She turned on the volume of the stereo and pulled out a vibrator.

Lincoln didn't budge. She came to the bed, with the vibrator in hand. She turned it on, hearing the slight buzzing noise.

"I love you, Lincoln," she said. "I want you to be comfortable in each and every way. Now, I want you to experience what it is like to make love in a lesbian point of view." She spread her smile. "Spread your legs, baby."

He spread his legs, feeling the intensity of this.

"Close your eyes, baby and let me work my magic."

 _ **To be continued…. I know what you are thinking. Why stop at the last moment? My girlfriend suggested this cliffhanger. I will continue this story at another time. Stay tuned for the next chapter for she will be the one doing it.**_


	3. The Wake Up Call or How to Bother Clyde

_**Hey ladies and gentleman, this is the girlfriend of the author and I go by [girlfriendoftheauthor]. This is my ill attempt at writing a story on his behalf. He took a break for this series so I can write it. I hope you guys enjoy it.**_

* * *

The cell phone on his dresser woke Clyde. The luminous hands of his clock pointed to a little after eleven in the evening, which was way past his bedtime. Clyde rubbed the sleepiness from his eyes. He heard his cell phone ring into the night. He could only think of one person who would call at such an ungodly hour. See the beginning of this harem, Clyde has served the role of assistant or a secondary sidekick. In his mind, where is the advantage and benefits in it? There hasn't been a girl in his corner. Well, there was Penelope and there was solidarity in their relationship. But, it didn't hurt for the wingman to get a chase from a girl every now and again. He was one of a couple of people that knows all of the girls that are in his harem, including Nory and Willow.

The kept ringing and he knew it will continue to ring until he picked it up. Lincoln knew how to kill his evening. He must realize that normal, non-harem people have to be at work or school in the morning. But, not Lincoln Loud. When there was trouble, Clyde came to the rescue. There were many times he wanted to tell him in his ear to end the harem if they were causing him trouble. Nevertheless, he was too much of his parents. Very calm, tranquil, and didn't look for trouble.

He stepped out of bed, and bumped into a few things before finding his glasses. He managed to find his way through the darkness to his cell phone. All the while, the phone kept its merciless ringing.

Clyde yawned as he answered the phone for his troubled friend. "Hey, Lincoln. What's up?"

"Took you long enough, bro," Lincoln said. "Do you know how long I have been standing outside around your house to let me in?"

Clyde frowned in the dark, saying nothing. Clyde was thinking if he was such an emergency, why not phone the police. He knew that it was only one person he was running away from. He sighed heavily.

"Do you hear me, Clyde?"

Clyde yawned. "Give me a minute." He took his time to reach for his slippers. He stepped out of the bedroom into the darkened hallway. He was grateful that his parents were out for the evening. Knowing of their activities, they wouldn't be home until later in the day. And he was certainly happy that the cats were in his parents' room. He continued to walk until he made it to the door. As soon as he opened it, he saw Lincoln running into the door, slamming it quickly.

Clyde sighed once again before yawning into the darkness. "How can I help you this time, Lincoln? Which girl did you pissed off?"

Lincoln frowned. "Well, excuse me if this harem thing is pissing you off."

Clyde returned his frown. "First of all, you called me to my aid. It is eleven in the evening. We have school in the morning. You answered rudely and expect me to take you in my house." He scanned at the door. "I should let your ass out to fend for your damn self if you are going to talk to me like that." When Clyde gets sleep deprived, his other side gets exposed. "I don't know who in the hell think you are talking to? That kind of shit get your ass hit. Understand?"

Lincoln took a couple of breaths. "Listen. Clyde, I am sorry. I was in panic mode. I wasn't trying to insult or rush you. I was scare being out there." He looked at the door. "Especially when she is looking for me."

Clyde took some deep breaths to lower his composure. "It's okay, Linc. Anyway, by the looks of your tattered clothes, the scratches on you, and three different bite marks. It is none other than Willow." He let out a smirk. "You know you are in deep shit, right?"

Clyde has consulted with a colleague by the name of Luka Fatelbern. His colleague explained the dynamics of vampires like Willow. Because of his tiresome demeanor, he was going to point out one important rule: never run away from a vampire.

"Dude, she was upset about the Redbox machine," he said while panting. "She was going nuts. She was taking it too far. It was starting to hurt. I didn't have much choice."

"Okay," said Clyde. "So, because you ran away from the queen of the night, you need a place to crash for the night?"

Lincoln nodded his head. "Yes, please. Plus, I need you this evening. I know I haven't been perfect on the friendship scale, but please help me."

He sighed. "Lincoln, you know I will always have your back."

"Thanks, dude."

Lincoln went to the guest room where he usually spend some nights. Normally, the white-haired would stay with Clyde. However, Clyde admitted before going to bed that he hasn't been sleeping well. Part of the reason was in part of Lincoln.

This was the third time this week Lincoln sought Clyde for sanctuary. So, in a way, Lincoln was understanding on how frustrated was his best friend.

He promised himself to make it up to Clyde in the morning. For now, he just wanted to get some sleep. As he began to shut his eyes, he saw the very person who he was running from.

"Wake up, darling," she said while tapping on the window. "I've found you." She was very calm, which wasn't a good sign from the yandere vampire. "Come on now, Lincoln. Roll up the window so we can talk."

Lincoln was panting. Willow was too calm. Her eyes displayed worry. He kept his guard. He raised part of his window. Willow stared into the eyes of her young lover. She wasn't pleased. "I mean all of the way, my dear blood doll."

"This is fine. We can discuss whatever is on your mind right here."

She shook her head. "Do you really want to test my patience? Please open the door or I will do so by force."

Lincoln widened his eyes. "You wouldn't do that, Willow. Plus, you can't enter a home without permission."

Willow smiled. She let out a smirk before him. "Precious, Lincoln. My sweet blood doll. This isn't your home."

Lincoln flinched as she bust through the window with her fist. Lincoln crawled from the bed and headed for the door. However, it was locked.

"What the hell," he screamed. He knocked the door loudly. "Clyde, please. I don't want to be in here."

Lincoln grabbed the door furiously while Willow took her time as she removed her cape and put it on the bed. She cracked her neck as she prepared to do her usual routine to the white-haired child.

"Shh, shh! Relax!" She had already cornered Lincoln. "First, we will have our fun. Second, you know I am going to punish you." She glared towards him as he watched her eyes changed colors. "Now, look onto your mistress."

He followed her command.

"Good. Remove your clothing!"

"Yes, Mistress Willow."

"Excellent, but you know how much this hurts me, Lincoln. Testing my patience, betraying my trust, and running away from me? You know you must be punished. But for now, I will feed and then we have our fun." She tilted his chin to her sight. "We will save your punishment when we get home."

Meanwhile, Clyde was sitting on his bed as he was preparing for sleep. Suddenly, he received a phone call. He stepped from the bed and answered it. It was from Haiku, Willow's ward.

"Hey, Haiku."

"Hey, yourself," answered Haiku. "Mistress wants to thank you for locating him. Funds will be wired to your account in the morning."

"I appreciate it."

"Certainly. Clyde, I do have a personal question."

"Ask away."

"Why would you sell out Lincoln. Quite a loyalty kill."

Clyde let out a Cheshire Cat grin. "It's a secret. See you in school, Haiku."

Clyde turned off his cell phone and climbed into bed. He turned on his music to drown the noise of whatever Willow and Lincoln were doing.

 _Sorry, Lincoln. I bet you won't leave any cheese puffs on my manga books again._

 _ **To not be continued. Let's be honest. Clyde and Lincoln were kind of being assholes toward each other.**_


	4. So This Happened and I'm Okay With It

_The girls waited a few minutes after the final bell concluded school for the day. Angela mentioned to the others that she was grateful that it was a Friday to do their bidding. She was at the mirror, applying some makeup to her cheek. She grunted and cursed under her breath for the scratch mark Lincoln left her when attacking him earlier in the afternoon. She, then, brushed her hair. The others were looking at themselves in the mirror. Yumi was retrieving her handkerchief in her pocket and straightening her hair with her pocket comb. Danielle leaned against the sink, still looking at the unconscious Lincoln in the bathroom stall. Ronnie Anne sat on the sink, looking at the door. She wasn't in the mood to look at the girls or look at her once beloved childhood friend._

" _Winter is coming earlier and earlier every year," mentioned Yumi as she stared at the window. The sun was making its crest below the horizon. "It won't be long until nightfall."_

" _As long we make our dues for tonight, then I don't give a damn when the sun sets," said Angela as she was applying eyeshadow. "Ronnie Anne, Yumi." The leader stopped what she was doing and turned to the girls. It took a moment before Ronnie Anne registered in her mind that her name was called. Angela displayed a smug look at Ronnie Anne, causing her to snap her fingers. "Ronnie, snap out of this. Don't need you to get sympathetic over our gofer."_

 _Ronnie Anne blinked her eyes, staring at Angela. She furrowed her eyes. "Do I think I give a damn about that white bread?" She scoffed. "That his ass fault for being such a fucking weakling."_

 _Danielle closed her compact, staring directly into Ronnie Anne's eyes. "If you didn't give a damn, why didn't you join us?"_

 _She was taken aback at the comment. Ronnie Anne didn't have the stomach to watch her former friend being gang rape. Over the course of a couple of hours, the girls took turns raping, ravishing, and terrorizing the white-haired child. Danielle, Yumi, and Angela had their use of the strap-on on Lincoln. There was even time for Yumi and Danielle to have a second round. Among the girls who exacerbated the situation was the sadist Danielle. Danielle showed no mercy to Lincoln. She wanted to see blood, each and every time she had her way with him. She wanted to give him a reminder each time of who was in control. When comparing Danielle to her tactics, Angela and Yumi were vanilla by her standards._

 _She stammered for a second, tilting back to the sink. "I didn't do it. I didn't do it because I wasn't in the fucking mood, okay?" She scoffed. "All you fucking putos do is think about sex. Can a girl sometimes watch the action. I mean it is good enough that I have assisted you in filming the damn thing."_

 _The girls turned when Yumi snapped her fingers. "Eureka! I am actually glad you have said something." She smiled at the girls. "Make sure to send your videos to me before deleting them. We don't need any evidence, just in case."_

" _I don't think Lincoln has the balls to go to the cops," scoffed Danielle. She licked her lips before swaying her long black hair. "To be honest, I don't mind going for another round with him. He makes me feel like I am alive when dominating him." She began shivering before turning to Angela. Before she could respond, Angela interrupted her. Meanwhile, Ronnie Anne was grateful that the group got sidetracked from their previous conversation._

" _Be as it may, we don't want to take any chances," said Angela. "We do have plenty of evidence to blackmail him. And I know people from back channels that can submit this snuff and make his life into a living hell."_

" _We are sure going to remind each and every time when he caters to us," said Yumi while making her hair into a ponytail. "But, we have to go. We got to get ready for tonight."_

 _Angela instructed Yumi to go to her foster parent's house to retrieve the goods and to meet her behind the Gus' Games and Grub this evening. Meanwhile, she told Ronnie Anne to go to the barbershop nearby to get some condoms. Angela knew the barber working there and always kept a bucket of free condoms for anyone who was unable to afford to purchase any. The barber also kept them there for teenagers who were practicing safe sex. As much Ronnie Anne didn't want to leave Lincoln, she didn't want to further upset her leader. She shut her eyes and exited the door._

 _Angela and Danielle remained in the bathroom. In the stall was the unconscious Lincoln. Angela knew that Danielle wanted more, but deter her from doing so. "I know what you crave, dear. Wait for now." Angela came from behind Danielle, wrapping her hands tenderly on her hips. Danielle let out a small moan as she felt Angela's lips touching her neck. Angela trailed her tongue up to Danielle's ear, biting it at the lobe._

" _Bite it harder, baby," she asked Angela to do. The redhead bit harder into her ear, allowing a transmission of energy, a spark to the already aroused Danielle. Angela trailed her hands to Danielle's skirt, easing her way into her panties. She bucked her hips as Danielle was bucking with it. Danielle wanted to climax, but Angela decided to stop._

" _That is enough for now." Angela removed her hands from Danielle's skirt. She saw her glazed fingers and partook her juices in her mouth. She let out a smile before giving her a peck on her cheek._

" _Delicious, just like my darling," said the redheaded leader. What Yumi and Ronnie Anne didn't know was that Angela and Danielle have been in a lesbian relationship over the course of a few months. Angela identified as bisexual, but preferred the company of women over men. Danielle identified as bisexual, but preferred the company of men over women. Despite that slight difference, the two had a common goal. And that goal was to be a dueling force to wreak havoc to anyone who dared challenge them._

 _She stared at Lincoln. "So, he is what you wanted." Danielle shook her head. Angela walked to the stall, seeing the blood continue to leak from his anus. Lincoln's breath was shallow, but he was still alive. "I must say. He is going to make a good gofer. Honestly, I was eyeing for a minute, too. I just don't have the guts to express it in front of the others."_

" _I want him more than just a gofer," said Danielle as she wrapped her arms around Angela's hips. "I want him."_

 _Angela let out a smile. "I do, too. But we can't let the others know."_

" _They won't," said Danielle. "You don't think Lincoln is going to leave us?"_

 _Angela displayed her infamous smirk. "Trust me, baby. If we train Lincoln the way we want him to be. He will crave us and he can be used at our disposal."_

* * *

Sam clicked the pause button on her remote control. She displayed hints of frustration as she furrowed the bootleg copy of a DVD she had purchased from a bodega when she visited Atlantic Beach over the weekend. Under the impression of the DVD cover, she anticipated being some hot female domination with a submissive male. Part of the reason she had purchased it because the character was named and looked similar to her Lincoln. Before inviting Luna and Lincoln to her apartment, she wanted to sample the movie. Tonight was her night of having Lincoln and she wanted it to be special. She licked her lips out of oddness. She wanted it to be foreplay, something to get her girlfriend and her boyfriend hot and bothered before having their lovable threesome. Just to make tonight as festive as she can be, she even acquired marijuana.

She was an avid user, but Luna occasionally smoked when she was stressed. Lincoln was straight edged for he neither drink nor smoke. However, giving him a contact high was enough to intensify their pleasure.

But since she watched the DVD, she decided to have a sober night. She heard the doorbell ring. She turned off the television. She reached for her slippers and made her way out of the bedroom and going to the front door.

As always, her father and his girlfriend weren't home. Her father was spending the evening with his girlfriend's parents and won't be expected until the next day, or so he always claimed. Sam didn't fret because she enjoyed the alone time. She and her father's relationship was very dry, but she wasn't going to put forth the effort if he wasn't. The company she kept were sacred. The promise rings that she, Luna, and Lincoln wore were meaningful, declaring their love for each other. Love that one day can turn into a wedding. Love that can result in being a mother. Despite the numerous unprotected sex and multiple uses of fertility pills, the results remained the same for she had yet to get pregnant.

She had done research, even took samples of his semen and took it to a friend of hers at Wayne State University in neighboring Detroit. According to her friend, his semen was capable of producing children.

Her thoughts dissipated when she came to the door. Her gloom of earlier turned into joy when seeing her beloved Louds in front of her doorstep. Upon opening, Luna ran to embrace her lover, giving her tender kisses. Sam closed her eyes to soak in her rocker's love. They broke the kiss, trailing the saliva. Without hesitation, Sam reached over to the white-haired child and partook in his kiss. Sam pressed her lips, gripping her young lover as if she wanted to devour him. Luna came behind Lincoln and began kissing his neck. She grabbed his hips, pressing tightly. Lincoln was muffling, straining to get loose.

"Girls, girls. Stop for a moment," screamed Lincoln. The girls stopped, giving him a little distance.

"What's the matter, my love," questioned Sam.

He wiped the saliva with his sleeve. "It is nothing. It is just that." He rolled his eyes to the opened door.

Sam giggled. "Oops, sorry about that." She slapped Lincoln's butt and grabbed Luna's butt before closing the door. She looked through the peephole, hoping no one was looking at them. Especially a certain pest who lived not too far from her complex.

She questioned on what did Lincoln saw in the freaky hikikomori. That was out of character for Lincoln, she thought. However, questioning the dynamics of the harem brought fear. She didn't want to lose Lincoln so she kept her opinions and comments to herself. She was grateful that she was having time alone with her lovers.

"What excuse did you give your mother this time," asked Sam. She was walking into the living room. Luna helped Lincoln with taking off his jacket.

"DIdn't tell her anything," replied Luna. "With my father at home, she did not have any choice but to see me go."

Sam giggled while shrugging her shoulders. "Hey, Papa Lynn strikes again to save the day."

Luna scoffed. "Damn, right. Hands off the merchandise, Mom." She scanned at Lincoln as he went to living room. "That is reserved for me!"

Luna went into the kitchen to prepare dinner. Familiar with her house, she pulled the supplies to make a simple dinner. Unbeknownst to Lincoln, Luna always added an extra ingredient to enhance his stamina. Luna winked which made Sam smiled as she pushed him into the living room sofa.

"Linky, Linky," she grinned. "Which movie do you want to see today?" She was on top of him. Per usual, the blushing white-haired child looked away. It didn't go unnoticed as she put her hand inside of his shirt.

"It doesn't matter, Sam. It isn't like we won't be able to finish it." Sam knew that Lincoln was telling the truth. Most of the time, the trio could barely make through halfway before engaging in sexual acts. Acts that most of the time Lincoln never witnessed. Sam promised herself to not use chloroform, this time.

Lincoln peeked at the coffee table and saw a DVD lying there. Sam saw as he went to go for it. Before she could grab it in time, it was too late.

" _Would You Cry For Me_ ," said Lincoln aloud. He slapped his head. "Great! Just great!"

Sam sighed. "Lincoln. It is not what you think…."

Lincoln interjected. "Relax, Sam. I am not mad at you. Why I am even bothered by the multiple universes I appear in."

Sam blinked for a moment. "I am confused."

Lincoln sat up and looked at the cover. "I am no skeptic, but it doesn't surprise me of my proverbial character being used in other places. I mean, this isn't the first time me or my other forms have appeared in things other than this universe." He sighed. "Rather you believe it or not, Sam. We are just mere character made by an author."

"Lincoln."

"It is true. We do our role at his pleasure. I mean, look in your collection. _Ronnie Drake and the Silver Porsche, Not Your Ordinary Weekend_ , and that is some of the few. You also a fuel to be turned on by these things anyway."

"Sorry, can't help it."

"I know you can't," said Lincoln. "And neither can Luna. No matter how I look at it, you know what. Play the tape. I want to get this over with."

* * *

Meanwhile, Nory was standing outside of Sam's apartment. Her Lincoln senses were tingling and she knew that Lincoln was within the vicinity. The former hikikomori and Sam didn't care for each other. Although they were neighbors, even prior to meeting Lincoln, they weren't the best of neighbors. A few months ago, Nory was walking home from school and was ambushed by Sam's Spanish Terrier dog. Instead of apologizing, she cursed at Nory for being in the way.

It wasn't long when Nory got even with Sam. Nory wouldn't go into details, but Sam's dog no longer lived in the apartment complex. Her dog wasn't among the living anymore.

"How dare those fucking whores have their hands on my fucking Lincoln," cried Nory. She kept a stern gaze on Luna and Sam as they were looking at a movie. She pressed closer to see what kind of movie where they watching.

Her eyes widened in terror as she watched Lincoln began raped by other girls in a bathroom stall. Her eyes changed color and her nails began to grew. She began grunting heavily, knowing that she had the power to break down Sam's door.

"Those FUCKING sluts," she barked. "They have filmed my Lincoln get ravished and forcing him to watch it? The nerve. I should fucking end you all."

Suddenly, she heard someone making a slow clap behind her.

She turned as she saw the black-haired vampire in her usual gothic lolita clothing. Her cape drifted to the ground. She had a smirk on her face, which was surprising to the former hikikomori.

"Well, isn't it my little sister, Willow," said Nory.

She clicked her tongue. "Doesn't feel good when something of yours get snatched away." She walked toward her sister. "It doesn't feel good at all."

"Surprise you are having a calm demeanor tonight," said Nory. "I would have thought it will be killing season."

Willow shook her head. "No, no. I want to destroy them." She gritted her teeth. "More than you can imagine. I am just fetched that we are sitting here without wanting to kill each other." She was tickled. "First time we met without killing each other, Ayna."

Nory smiled. "You're right, sis. However, I do want to hurt Sam and Luna. They don't appreciate him like I do."

"More like _I_ do," snapped Willow. She looked at her older sister. "Feel like making a compromise?"

"For once, I don't mind actually mind," she said. "I am ready to attack on cue."

"On my mark," said Willow. "One...two...three."

* * *

A certain blonde witch woke in the dead of night. The sound of thunder woke her up from the strange dream. She sat up, rubbing the sores from her endeavors of the previous day. She looked at the ceiling, thinking about the obscure dream she had. She sighed heavily. "Damn, that was one hell of a dream."

"Mom?"

The blonde witch rubbed the sleepiness in her eyes before seeing her son lying beside her. The pink-haired child displayed concern, sitting up in the process.

"What are you doing up," she questioned her son. "Go and get some sleep."

He shook his head. "I was worried, Mom. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I am. Just had a strange dream." She ran her finger through her hair.

"Is it something you want to discuss," questioned her son.

"Not really, Crona," she told him. "It is too vague. However, there is something you can do for me since you are awake."

He blushed as his eyes were shifting away from his mother as she began to disrobe.

"Would give this Medusa some pampering from this nightmare?"

Crona gulped as he saw his mother disrobing her clothes, exposing her nakedness. She spread her legs in the process. "This will be very pleasing to make the nightmares go away. Care to partake, son?"

"Yes, mother."

She cradled her son as she watched him go down on her. She put the blanket over him to give her warmth and then some.

She sucked in her breath, caught up in the pleasure. "That is good, Crona. Tame this witch!"

"Yes, mother."

 _ **I (or I don't) apologize for the confusion of this crazy story. My girlfriend gave me the idea for making this concept. As for Crona and Medusa, I think you guys know where this will go. But don't worry, they won't be featured in this series. Until next time.**_


	5. She Says Ohh Wee When It's And Then

_**So, another chapter is this crazy harem series, which no way, shape, or form relate to the plot of These Random Moments, is brought to you by yours truly and co-written by [thegirlfriendoftheauthor]. So, here is another story for No Matter How I Look At It, It's Still You Girls' Fault. So, let it begin.**_

 **In this chapter, Lisa consults help from an unlikely source. She wants to find a way to help Lincoln with his harem. However, things never go right with him when he is involved with this. Fate is a cruel mistress to him. Find out what happens in this chapter.**

* * *

Lisa decided to make a phone call while she had some down time to herself. As a reminder to herself and to the other residents of the Loud Household, down time was peace and quiet. No longer feeling responsible of scientific studies, research, and quality time with the family, she wanted the weekly two hours she craved and deserved. Therefore, she took her leave from the residence, residing in the makeshift tent she made behind the shed. In the tent, many would suspect the young genius to have scientific magazines, lab equipment, test subjects, and the like. However, it was a regular tent with snacks, a portable television (for she wasn't a big fan of tablets), and a mp3 player. Watching old school television, listening to the days of Nirvana, Green Day, Hole, The Smashing Pumpkins, Soundgarden, and the like, and lying back on her pillow gave Lisa realization that it was worth it. Even if it was two hours out of her busy weekly schedule.

On the screen of her cell phone, the wallpaper displayed her inspiration for science. A particular person who goes by the name Dexter from _Dexter's Laboratory._ Lisa sighed for this was her crush. She chagrined the blonde for messing with his experiments for she, too, can relate to Dexter and of course, the many blondes who thwarted her experiments. "Dexter, old boy. We are just two birds in a feather. Sigh, it is too bad that I am unable to meet you. Someday, someday, wherever you may be." She clicked on the contact page. She scanned around to be certain no one was watching. She clicked on the tab that said Unknown. She made the call. She waited for a few rings until it answer.

"What now." The raspy, cough was heavily recognized on the line. Lisa could hear the sound of his inhaler entering his lungs before retrieving himself back to the phone. It didn't faze Lisa for this was the typical greeting the duo had made since having contact with each other over the last few months.

"'What now' is a resolution that you are valuing this partnership in allocating resources," replied Lisa with absoluteness under her strong tongue. Lisa never backed down on anybody. Despite her age and weak constitution, no one should ever underestimate Lisa. If the genius was capable of changing weather condition, then who knows kind of things she can produce.

"Tactful, witty, and charming, my fair Lisa," replied the contact. "I just wish I can work with people consistently like you. Unlike a depressed bank robber, a psychopath, and a 2-bit, now 3-bit gangbanger with a happy trigger finger. Alas, that is the cards I have played and much be dealt." He paused for a moment. "Judging by the tenacity of your calling and with much, much consistency, you must have something on your plate."

"You know me like a book, Lester," said Lisa. "I do. Indeed I do, but I need you to keep this on the "down low," or whatever vernacular people are saying these days."

"Shoot," replied Lester. "I can do whatever I can. Trust me. You have my information, know my credentials." He smirked. "Didn't expect a grade-schooler to hack into this files of mine. I thought I was safe to a T. But, these days, children can code at an early age and outdo us old heads."

"It is all about knowledge and how to consolidate," answered Lisa. "But, enough flirting about code and resources. I need some help acquiring any item."

She heard him cracking his knuckles followed by returning to typing on the computer screen. Looking at the appearances of his office, this corrugated back office of his seems like a dungeon for a repressed and depressed otaku. A man who was confined in the golden years of olden technology before everything changed. Despite the changes, the man refused to conform from yesteryear.

"Shoot. Tell me what you need and I can make it work," answered Lester.

"Awesomely done, Lester Crest. I knew I can rely on you," said Lisa.

"More like your wallet," he interjected.

"Hey! Funds have been wired. I do have other people I work with," replied Lisa.

"No. No. I am not doubting your credibility. I am amazed that you are able to keep appearances without your family checking in on you," said Lester.

"I know, Lest. However, there is eleven of us in this family." Lisa stopped before going any further. Lisa is one of the younger sister who was aware of the changing tide in the household. She might be a genius, but it doesn't take when realizing that there were many of her siblings who were getting attached to her brother. She, for one, didn't care for it gave her more too time to focus on research. She followed the philosophy of one of her favorite scientist, Rick Sanchez. She believed that love is a chemical and it comes and goes. Therefore, she never relied on romance. Science was and is her foreplay. However, the curiosity began spreading when she realized Lucy was in the fray of wanting Lincoln.

Over the last couple of weeks, Lisa conducted studies, taking notes on the things that were occuring with the family. She knew that all of her older siblings have spent the night with Lincoln or Lincoln have spent the night with them. She had also studied the changing relationship with her mother and Lincoln. Also, the absence of her father was reoccurring. Also, Lincoln wasn't home often as well. Despite her separation from family, she believed that unity was important. In other words, dynamic was off and it was causing the family to become peculiar with each other. She would be damned to be looked at as a resource for comfort. Thus the reason of getting in contact with Lester.

"I am not so worried. My parents have enough on their plate. In time, they would come to me, maybe," she shrugged her shoulder. "Anyway, there is a toxin I would like to acquire for an experiment."

"Toxin? Hmm. Not that hard, but depending on what and where," said Lester.

"It has to be nonlethal. I am looking for something to change some pheromones of my sister, per se," answered Lisa. "It is for the sake of a dear friend." _I can't say brother, or else, he would be thinking if my family is a bunch of incest freaks. And I will be damned if he figures that out._ " Just to see if it could make a different outcome."

He giggled. "Fetching. What seems to be the problem?"

"You are getting paid to get what I need. No details, remember."

"Right, but just in case if the men in suits pays a visit to Royal Woods. Just saying."

"Fine, fine, fine. Just be sure to come up with a cover story, if the worse should occur. I do have the money."

"I trust you, Lisa. No doubt about that." He giggled once more, but the devilish grin behind worried Lisa.

"Look at my funds and not the webcam of my sisters. Leni got worried when her webcam was opened mysteriously."

"Hey!" He shouted. "In my defense, those cams were already opened. I happened to click…"

"Just do your job right," replied Lisa. "Leni is a young adult, but still too young for you."

"Fine, fine, fine," said Lester, sounding a bit frustrated. "So, this toxin. What use?"

"Change pheromones, seeing if can change one's affection for somebody."

"Oh," he said loudly. "I can get that. No problem. How soon do you want it."

"Immediately, if you please. I want to check it out as soon as you can," said Lisa. "I will be in the lab as soon as I can acquire it."

"No worries, Lisa. I am sure one of those bozos can get it without causing suspicion. Hmm. I might get Franklin or Trevor to do it." He clicked his tongue. "Anyway, I will send you the things you need as soon as I can."

"Excellent, Mr. Crest," said Lisa. "Money will arrive to your account as soon as possible."

"As always, a pleasure," said Lester.

Lisa hang up the phone and threw it on the floor. She crossed her legs and grabbed the portable television. It wasn't often that the young genius watched television, but nothing got her in mood unless it was _Seinfeld._ She pulled on her earbuds and got into some listening pleasure of The Smashing Pumpkins while watching television.

The next day, Lisa was arriving home from school when she saw a package in front of her door. On the box, the order came from the Scholastic Books Publishing Company. Lori came from behind her, clicking her tongue. "I'd tell you, Lisa. Never enough with the books. No wonder you can't find a man."

"You can't spell man unless it had d-i-c-k or s-l-u-t or s-e-m-e-n-i-n-y-o-u-r-a-s-s," she muttered under her breath.

Lori was well into the house to not hear the rest of Lisa's ranting. She shook her head and carried her package to the shed in the backyard. She locked the door for she didn't want to be disturbed. She tossed aside her school books, opening the package that contained the ingredients for her experiment. Attached to the package contained a note.

 _Let just say that blood was spilled in order to get that package. I won't say the amount of people that lost their lives. I won't say what they tell you on the news is similar. Nevertheless, you know our drill. Handle with care. Let me know if you need anything else._

 _~L.C._

She placed the note in her pocket. She removed the white foam casing and in her way sight, the key ingredient, her toxin. The color was purple in the clear test tube. It had a fizz as if it can look like grape soda. Before even receiving the package, Lisa had a plan on how and what she was going to do with this.

Lisa had a strong concern for her brother, Lincoln. A few weeks before, Lincoln came and sought advice for her. Of course, it require a fee of $25 and a gift card to Gus' Games and Grub. He handed the money without incident and that was concern number one. Lisa knew of the allowance the family received each week. LIncoln was getting four times the amount. She knew that it didn't come from her parents alone.

Unbeknownst to Lincoln, Lisa had paid two people to check on Lincoln. They were Haiku and Tabby. Over the course of the few weeks, both came with the same thing. They reported sightings with Nurse Kazami, Tomoko, and Ms. DiMartino. Not wanting to know the details, she wanted to know his condition. They said the same: tired, restless, sore, and the scent of "sweat, embarrassment, and shame." Meanwhile, she observed the very conditions when he spend the night with their sisters. She knew the conclusion, but just wanted confirmation.

She ran Lincoln through a few trials. Checking his heart rate, checking his blood pressure, and the like. She put him through some physical workouts. In the end, she told Lincoln to take a rest, drink plenty of fluids, and to stay away from excessive exercises for awhile.

Of course, that never sufficed. Lisa was hoping that this toxin can null the effects of her sisters' activities. She sighed for she has to admit that she hoped that this toxin can null the effects of her sisters' sex drive from her brother. And the same with her mother and anybody else that was involved in this harem.

Once again, she doesn't have total proof for she wanted Lincoln to admit that he had a harem. Everything in this was a hypothesis, she was just running trials to see if Lincoln can control this paradigm he was currently participating.

With a few additional ingredients, she hoped that this chemical would change their activity and wanted less desire of her brother. She had hoped that it can calm them down. As much as she was a busy person, she hated change. Like the time she was promoted to her brother's grade and it changed the family's dynamic. She didn't like that. Deep down, she enjoyed her family. She can say she actually loved them.

So, this trial was in dedication of her family. She hoped that this experiment would return them to normal.

Lisa worked on the experiment into the evening. She phoned her mother to save her dinner in the oven. She was dealing with chemicals that can endanger her or those around a three block vicinity of the neighborhood. Lisa took short breaks, careful to not mess with the chemical's short shelf-life. It took pressure on the young genius, but she was two-thirds complete of the experiment. Because the chemicals she mixed required refrigeration, she had to put it in the kitchen until she was complete with it. She yawned heavily. She looked at the clock, it was a quarter after ten in the evening. She poured the chemicals in a plastic container. Because it looked similar to a drinking pitcher, she wrote "do not touch" on it. She carried the container and made her way to the kitchen.

She reached the kitchen and gently placed thepitcher into the refrigerator. She made a slight prayer to the gods for it to not be opened. She wasn't really hungry. She put her dinner in the refrigerator for she would eat it for lunch tomorrow. She made herself a sandwich and went to bed.

* * *

Later that evening, the eldest Louds, Lori and Leni, were coming downstairs and entering the kitchen. They were not in their usual nightwear. The girls were wearing their panties and they were braless. The girls were drenched in sweat. Judging by the hickey marks on each other, they were practicing their game of "boyfriend and girlfriend" with each other.

"Damn, you were intense, Leni," said Lori as she wiped the sweat from her forehead. "I think you might need to take a break from being Lincoln for awhile."

"Sorry, sis. But I am moist. I need his loving and it is not fair we won't have it tonight," she whimpered.

Lori opened the refrigerator. "Don't sweat it, sis. In time, he will become ours. Until then, we have to settle for what we have." She winked. "If it makes you feel better, I secretly molded Lincoln's dick." She grinned. "It should be arriving in a couple of days."

Leni eyes' widened. "Lori, you are the best."

"Thank me later, sis," the eldest blonde said as she saw the purple-filled liquid in the pitcher. She read the note aloud. "Do not touch." She clicked her tongue, laughing as she removed the sign. "Probably Mom's special drinks to keep her going with Lincoln."

"If it is, then give me a sip. Because regardless of Lincoln's feelings, I want a fill of our man," said Leni.

Lori went into the cabinet to retrieve some glasses. She put them on the kitchen table. Leni sat on the chair while Lori poured the cocotion into their glasses. "It smells and looks good," said Leni.

"Well, bottom's up," said Lori. The girls toasted their glasses and began to drink the cocotion. Their faces detailed a bit of confusion, but continued to drink anyway.

Lori put her glass down. "Not bad," she burped. "Bit of a mild funky aftertaste."

"Yeah. Reminds me of that homemade drink your boyfriend got us to try when he came back from Peru," said Leni.

"Yeah, you're kind of right. Well, this is certainly not a jailhouse recipe," said Lori while laughing. "Remember how Bobby tried seducing us?"

Leni smiled. "It is yummy, but his dick doesn't have the width, girth, or length of Lincoln's."

"Even the angle of the shaft," answered Lori.

Leni put her finger up. "And the YAW! Can't forget about the YAW!"

The girls took amount glass from the pitcher. They drank it and put the rest back in the refrigerator. "That hits the spot," said Lori. "C'mon, sis. Let's call it the night and hit the sack." She stared at her sister. She was sitting there.

Meanwhile, Leni was feeling strange. It was like a rush. Her nerves were rattled. Her body was in heat. Her pores were releasing sweat. Her pussy was getting wet. All the while, her mind was focusing on her brother, Lincoln.

"Lincoln," replied Leni faintly. Suddenly, she grabbed her stomach, falling from the chair and crouching on the ground.

Lori was worried. She went to her sister's aid, but suddenly, the same time was occuring with her as well. She felt her juices from her vagina dripping to her leg. Her knees buckled, dripping to the pudding as she began getting stomach cramps. She tried fighting up, but her mind began drifting onto her brother as well.

Both sisters were visualizing their love, their obsession, their relationship, their everything with their brother. Leni felt her nipples protruding in her shirt. Lori was feeling a tingling sensation coming from her clitoris.

"Lincoln," grunted Leni.

"Lincoln, where are you," replied Lori.

Both girls looked to each other as they were lying on the floor. Both reached out to grab each other's hand.

"Do you know what I am thinking," questioned Lori.

"As always, my dearest sis," replied Leni.

"We want Lincoln. Right here! Right now! Tonight!" The sisters moaned until the effects disappeared. They were breathing heavily. Lori felt that she had enough energy to stand up. As she observed her surroundings, she thought about that strange drink.

"What in the hell was in that stuff," she questioned. She turned to Leni when she saw something different about her. "Oh, my God! Look at your chest!"

Leni looked down and saw her bust grew larger in many sizes. The B cup Leni became a DD cup within those moments. She then return her glance to Lori. "Holy hell! Look at you!" She pointed Lori's groin region. She saw that her clitoris expanded in size. Her mouth was agape. "It...It looks like I have a dick or something."

"What was in the drink," questioned Leni.

"I don't know. But I do know this," said Lori.

Before Leni could answer, she ran out of the kitchen and head toward the stairs.

"Where are you going," questioned Leni.

"To our Linky's room, duh!" Lori was at the stairway. "First person to reach the door can fuck him first."

"You're so on," cried Leni as she left the kitchen.

* * *

A few minutes later, the back door to the kitchen was opened. It was the tomboy elder sister, Lynn, returning from a late night practice.

"Damn, my dogs are barking," cried Lynn as she took off her shoes. "I can use a drink."

She reached for the refrigerator to find her a drink. She saw a pitcher with a "do not touch" sign. She giggled as she took down the sign to pour herself a glass of whatever was in that pitcher.

She poured herself a glass before returning the pitcher into the refrigerator. She drank it quickly. It wasn't long until the drink took its effect on Lynn.

As she lied on the ground, she felt the urge to ravage her brother on sight. She felt the teeth of her canines expanding. The nails on her fingers and toes were extending.

"Lincoln," she faintly roared. "Where is my Lincoln?"

 _ **To be continued….I promise (or at least hope).**_


	6. Yep! A Story About the Queen Trap

**Warning: this chapter contains content between Lincoln and Chloe (a transgender girl). If boy x trap isn't your cup of tea, then please refrain from reading this story. Enjoy!**

* * *

The sound of video games filled the room as Lincoln was playing on his PlayStation console. _Overwatch_ was his game of choice. It was a gift from his mother for his efforts of being a good son as well as a wonderful lover. He was fortunate that he had the house to himself. Wherever his family was didn't matter for now as he was getting caught up in the role of being. He was getting ready to enjoy his afternoon until he received a phone call. He sighed, putting the game on pause to see who was the person calling.

"I hope it isn't Nurse Kazami." The white-haired told himself as he walked to the phone. "If I have to another physical examination, then I am going to be pissed." He saw that it wasn't the perverted nurse, but instead another person who doesn't require competition for she is in a league of her own.

"Chloe," he said aloud. He stared at the phone for a moment. Was he really going to allow this queen trap his time on this beautiful Saturday? He let the phone ring until it went silent. He sighed happily, returning back to the game at hand. He unpaused the game, continuing to play with full concentration. With the amount of snacks and drinks stored by his mini-fridge, he had the rest of the afternoon until his appointment with Willow later tonight. Unlike his ravaged filled nights, Willow told the white-haired child that she was cooking dinner for him. It was rare for Willow to cook. The yandere vampire preferred his "liquid platinum." A drifter from time to time; feasting on wild animals; and occasionally her mistress, Haiku. But, she promised Lincoln in a written message that tonight was going to be just dinner and a movie. However, she did include that she can't promise it won't involved sex. In fact, she actually wrote in the note to be prepared for sex. Lincoln started grinning on how he wished Willow was more honest with herself. The more he spent time with her, the more he didn't mind her company.

The phone rang again. He saw that it was Chloe again. He groaned on why was this trap calling him again. This time, he declined her call. He then returned back to the game.

The same time he unpaused the game, he heard something hitting the window. He turned to see the source of the noise. His mouth was agape when seeing what he had feared. The Queen Trap perched a ladder in front of his window. She displayed a Cheshire Cat grin, waving delicately with her fingers. What surprised Lincoln was that she wasn't wearing her typical clothing. On a regular day, the queen trap always wore the latest fashion trends. A day never went by without her wearing anything name brand. However, today was different. She was wearing an outfit that he had easily recognized. She was wearing a costume that looked similar to the character, Astolfo, or Rider of Black, in the _Fate/Grand Order_ series. Her pink wig was flowing in the wind. She was swaying her hips and throwing peace signs. She was in a happy mood. Lincoln was careful when seeing her smiling. Despite the bewitching look she was displaying, he knew that she was in an annoyed mood. One thing he should have learned throughout his relationship with her: never ignore her phone calls. As she made her way to the window, he saved the game. Before he turned off the console, the Queen Trap was opening his window.

She tsked as she climbed through his window, landing on his bed. "And to think you let this princess of royalty to use such a subservient entrance." She dusted herself off. "If I didn't know any better. You were trying me to teach me a lesson." She stuck her tongue. "I hope this dog isn't trying to sit beside himself."

"No, mistress," the white-haired murmured. He stayed at the floor, knowing that he was now in the position of his role whenever she was around. "I wasn't trying to sit beside myself."

"Good! Just remember your place and we can get along famously," she said.

"Yeah, yeah," he said under his breath. "So, what reason are you here today?"

She placed her hands on her hips. "How rude of you when talking with a guest? Why can't I come and have a chat with my property? I do give my servants plenty of love you know?"

Lincoln knew that Chloe was lying through her teeth. Recently, the Queen Trap have severed all of her ties with the many boys that she had under her web. Since being with him, she couldn't focus on anyone else. All dedication was to him. While he was thinking of a way to get himself comfortable, he couldn't but to observe the outfit she was currently wearing. Her pink wig complimented her porcelain skin. Her stockings were riding to her creamy thighs. He blushed when he saw a bit of her white and blue striped panties. It didn't go unnoticed from Chloe as she blushed in the process. She closed her legs.

"Hey, you pervert," interjected Chloe. "My eyes are up here."

He looked away. "Sorry, Chloe." He focused his attention back to the matter at hand. "Out of curiosity, the reason why you are wearing this?"

She giggled. "Well, yes!" She crossed her legs. "I am thinking of going to the cosplay convention they are having in Windsor this weekend. And well, since I am the most beautiful goddess of this region, I think I should make my presence there with the other nerds." She swayed her hip, rubbing her butt on his bed. "Give many perverts like you wet dreams."

"That's great," mentioned Lincoln as he stood up. "So, is that the only reason you came?"

"No," she said flatly. "Actually, I came here to spend time with you." She blew into her hair. "I thought you should be grateful someone gives a damn about you." She paused for a moment, standing up. "And there is something I want you to try on."

"Try on," he retorted.

"Yes," she said as she peered closer to his face. "Yes, try on. Do you think I was going to convention by myself? You must have been fooled." She went to the window where she pulled a black plastic bag inside of the room. "Since you are used to throwaways, I would be damned to use any of my name brand suitcases." She giggled. "I thought this costume would suit you for the convention." She wavered her hand to the closet. "Now, go inside and give this a try for me. I think it might suit you," she winked. "Come now, chop chop."

"Sure, jackass," he mumbled to himself before getting his arm grabbed by Chloe.

"What was that, dog," she asked. Lincoln noticed the twitching vein on her forehead. It briefly reminded him of those moments in anime before he was going to get hit. Her smile and her furrowed eyebrows matched the occasion.

"Nothing," he said with a nervous smile.

"Good," she said before hitting him on the shoulder.

 _Ouch!_

Chloe watched Lincoln entered the closet. She licked her lips when seeing his butt. Her eyes enjoyed the privilege of seeing Lincoln's rear end. She lied back on his bed, grabbing his pillow. She sank her face into his pillow, inhaling his scent.

"Oh, my God. Why must you tempt me," she said to herself. "It is like you are asking me to rape you." She scoffed. "Stupid Lincoln." She grabbed the pillow and turned over on top of it. She started to feel the itch from her groin. She was becoming aroused for her dick began protruding in her panties.

"If you honestly knew my opinion of you, stupid Lincoln," she moaned to herself. "If you knew how much I care about you. If you knew how much I don't want those bitches around you." She pressed her body on his pillow, humping while sniffing his covers. "Stupid Lincoln. Stupid bitches for having him. I will mark him. I will make sure he would never forget the name, the aura, the scent of Chloe Molyneaux." She paused for she forgot that Lincoln was in the closet. The outfit that she had for him to wear was something special from her collection. It was one of the many secrets that the Queen Trap kept to herself.

How can she tell the others that she was a closeted otaku? The images of her drawings, the works of her fanfiction were now based on Lincoln. She kept her composure when she saw the door partially opened.

"Chloe," said Lincoln.

"Yes, peasant," replied Chloe.

"Are you sure that it is the right outfit?"

"Why yes! I got it just for you?"

"How can I say this. It is very girly."

She scoffed. "Do we have problems? Do I need to pull out the collar again?"

"No. No, you don't."

"Good! Now step out and let me see."

Lincoln stepped out of the closet. He displayed nervousness, especially when he came out wearing a costume that was designed for her girl. He was sporting a pink wig with bows in his hair. His outfit resembled the character, Madoka, from the _Madoka Majica_ series. He stood nervously, flustered and blushing at the sight before him.

Chloe crossed her legs, smiling at the sight before her. "Why don't you look beautiful, Lincoln." She coughed. "I mean _Madoka!_ "

He looked to the floor. If he would have known that this was going to happen, he should have made that offer to hang out with Clyde. "This is totally weird." He covered his mouth. "Oh, God. Did I say her catchphrase!"

He saw Chloe displaying her cell phone. The sounds of clicking made him realize she was taking pictures. "This is rich. Look at you being a classic trap." Chloe stood up and walked to Lincoln. She observed his features. "Not bad, not bad. Javier did a great job designing your outfit to your size."

"You mean you were planning this," questioned Lincoln.

"I did," she said smiling. "Guilty, my subservient peasant. Much, much guilty." She took a phone to take a few more pictures of Lincoln. "Do a couple of poses. I couldn't imagine what others may think if they caught up in this position."

He covered his face. "Please, Chloe. Please, I don't want that to happen."

She shook her head in disagreement. "No, this is rich! I am definitely holding on to these."

Lincoln tried reaching her phone, but it was out of reach. "Please, Chloe. Don't do it." Chloe was running around in his room. Lincoln was trying to get to Chloe, but she had the upper hand.

"Stop it!"

"I don't wanna!"

"Please, Chloe!"

"Hell no, you dog!"

"You are pissing me off!"

"Then make me stop, _Linka!"_

Frustrated, Lincoln grabbed Chloe by her hips. He pushed her to his bed. Chloe was surprised by his instant dominance. He was now on top of her. His hands were on both of her arms. She still kept the grip on her cell phone.

"Now, give me the phone," demanded Lincoln.

Chloe kept her composure. "And if I say no? At this point, if people were to walk in. Who would be in trouble? Me or you?"

Lincoln was irritated. As much as he wanted to argue, to rant, there was no use. It was true. He cursed under his breath. She smirked. "Yeah, yeah. Quiet and docile. I like that. Very good!" As he lessened his grip, she grabbed his wrist, throwing him to the other side. She smiled as she was having the upper hand and she was on top of him.

"Linky, Linky, Linky," she tsked. "Despite my femininity, you must have forgotten my original gender. I dominant in any way." She winked, blowing into his ear. "You might as well accept your defeat. For you can never beat me."

Lincoln groaned. He looked away from the embarrassment he was currently facing. Here he was confined under Chloe and wearing girls' clothing. Not a way that he had his day planned.

"You know, Lincoln. You are very cute when you get frustrated." She used her free hand to caress his chin. She pressed forward and kissed his chin. "I like how you think you can run me, but accept the fact that I will always be the victor."

"Fine," he said. "However, there is one thing I can say to you right now."

"What is it, you dog?"

Lincoln let out a smirk. "I didn't hear a bell."

Lincoln pressed forward and kissed her on her lips. He entered his tongue inside of her cavern. Chloe was surprised, but became too entranced of the moment. She closed her eyes, loosening her grip as Lincoln wrapped his arms around her. They broke the kiss, leaving a trail of saliva between the pair.

"What the hell," said Chloe before Lincoln put his finger to her lips. "Shh!" exclaimed Lincoln. "Don't know why you should shocked. This is what you want." He kissed her on her neck. As he applied his tongue to her neck, she started moaning under his breath.

"Lincoln," she moaned in between breaths. "Stop! Stop it, I said. This isn't how it supposed to work!"

Lincoln didn't listen. He continued licking her neck, trailing it to the collar bone. He used his hands to open the collar of her shirt. He began unfastening it. "I must say, Chloe. You are very sexy dressing like Astolfo. A trap you are."

"Lincoln, don't. This is embarrassing. I order you to stop, you dog," she commanded.

"Sorry, mistress," he purred as he began disrobing her. "Sometimes, dogs disobey their owners. Especially if it is for a good reason." Lincoln watched in surprisement of his actions. He continued removing every article of clothing that was on Chloe. The only thing he left behind her was her pair of panties. "Sorry for undressing you, _Astolfo_. I mean your highness. I didn't want to dirty your clothes." After taking off her clothes, he removed his clothing as well. What surprised him was seeing Chloe in this position.

 _Never in my life have I ever felt this hard around Chloe. Something about me dominating her is turning me on. Of course, she is going to kill me afterwards, but for now, I will enjoy this moment,_

Lincoln rubbed his wig before returning to Chloe. Chloe's breath was labored as he continued to lick her chest. She moaned as she felt his tongue licking her. She tried to resist, but felt weakened by his charms. "Lincoln, please don't," she moaned to the white-haired. Lincoln nibbled on her nipple, savoring each moment. He continued until he had enough of one and went for the other.

Lincoln continued down her chest, licking her down to her navel. He pressed his tongue around the navel, circling it. She grabbed the sheets tightly as she felt her erection protruding from her panties. Lincoln kissed down her navel until he reached her groin.

"Your clit is getting messy," he purred to Chloe. "Were you expecting this, _Astolfo?_ Do you want _Madoka_ explore your pussy?"

Chloe didn't respond. She was turning beet red. It made Lincoln smile. "You not responding doesn't help you." He hovered his breath over her dick. She let out a slight moan. "What do you want me to do, _Astolfo_?"

She muttered. "Please...please….please explore my pussy, _Madoka_."

Lincoln grinned. "Wise choice. Allow me to partake on this, _Astolfo_." Lincoln opened his mouth to allow her dick to enter his mouth. It tasted funny at first, but continued to lick her throbbing member. Chloe took sharp breath as she was feeling the pleasure from her dick. "More, _Madoka._ More, please."

He licked the tip of her phallus with his tongue, tasting the precum that was coming from her dick. He was a novice when sucking on a penis when it compares to eating out pussy. It was thanks to the many girls of the harem that provided him with much practice. But, it was weird that how long her girth is when it was in his mouth. He pulled out when he could no longer handle it.

"I must say, _Astolfo,_ your clit does taste good," answered Lincoln as he came back to her dick. He licked the shaft, gripping to her testicles massaging them. She moaned the moment he did that.

" _Madoka, Madoka._ This feels good. Oh, my God. I am going to cum. I am going to cum," she moaned.

Lincoln returned his mouth to her dick and continue to lick it. "Come inside here. I will take it all."

"I am coming," she screamed as she pressed his head forward. She released her sperm into his mouth. At each spurt, Lincoln continued swallowing her sperm. Chloe was panting hard. She couldn't believe the events that were unfolding in front of her. Lincoln came on top of her, opening his mouth. She opened her mouth as the trail of her sperm entered her mouth. He came forward and gave her another kiss, swapping each other's content.

Lincoln broke the kiss. Chloe looked away while blushing.

"Was that pleasing to you, mistress _Astolfo_ ," questioned Lincoln as he swayed his hair.

He was greeted with a slap from Chloe. The impact made Lincoln land on his side. Her face frowned, still embarrassed. "Who in the hell do you think of dominating me?" She got on top of him. "There is no way in hell I would allow such a subservient _mutt_ to ravish me." She swayed her hair and felt sticky contents on her wig. "You even have your dirty seed on my wig. Do you know how much this cost? Higher than you can count!" She grabbed hold to his legs, making him spread. "I think a punishment is in order, you dog."

Chloe spread Lincoln's leg, exposing his cavern. She withdrew saliva from her mouth onto her finger. She applied her fingers into his ass. He grunted upon impact. She thrusted until she felt he was wide enough to enter. "There," she said. She rubbed her dick toward the entrance of his ass. "Time to stake my claim. And remind you of who _is your_ owner. I am your mistress and it is time you give me your respect!" She put her dick inside of his ass. He groaned the moment of entry. She grabbed his legs as it dangled over her shoulders. Lincoln's eyes were closed.

"Your asspussy is tight," said Chloe. "It is like my dick and your ass is made for each other." She started thrusting. "Oh, God, this feels good. I keep forgetting how good it feels to enter you, _Madoka!"_

Tears were escaping Lincoln's eyes as Chloe continue to have sex with him. Despite the pain he was receiving, it quickly transcended into pleasure. Chloe saw his dick standing at attention. "Tell me how it feels, _Madoka_?" She said in between thrust. "Tell your mistress _Astolfo_ how it feels?"

Lincoln was panting loudly. He let out slight moans. "It is starting to feel good."

"That is a good girl," said Chloe. "Take my dick, moan for your mistress. Let your asspussy know of its owner." Chloe leaned forward and wrapped her lips around Lincoln. Both enveloping one another, exchanging their contents. Chloe used her free hand to stroke his dick. "It feels good as I play with your boy pussy. Is your clitty liking the excitement?"

"Yes, mistress," moaned Lincoln. "I am getting close, mistress."

"Excellent, my pet," said Chloe. "Get ready to take my seed."

Chloe's thrust became faster. The slapping sounds of their bodies continued as she was close to climax. "I am about to come, Lincoln," she said while breaking character. "Take my seeds, Lincoln. Make me your bride."

"I am coming," cried Lincoln.

Lincoln spurted his seeds on his stomach. Chloe released her seeds inside of his ass. He felt the hotness of her semen entering his ass. The feeling was compared to having a full stomach. She kept thrusting until she couldn't release anymore. She gave him a kiss to the forehead before releasing her dick from his cavern.

She sat up as she backed her body against the wall. She was feeling his stickiness around her stomach. "I must say, Lincoln. I was really backed up. I have never came that much before." She looked at his ass, seeing her semen leaking out of it. Lincoln was quiet, but nodded in confirmation. He spotted the tissue box on his nightstand. As he reach for them, Chloe grabbed his hand. She glared at him, caressing his cheek and pushing him back to the bed.

She scoffed. "Don't ever say I never clean up your mess." She spread his legs and entered her tongue into his cavern. The feeling of her flesh widened his eyes as she cleaned out her semen. She continued ingesting her contents until there was nothing left. She smiled as she swallowed it. "There. All clean."

"Thanks," answered Lincoln. As he was about to get up, she pushed him back to the bed.

"Did I say I was finished with you," she barked at him. "God, you make things difficult." She placed her hands on his dick, massaging the shaft. It didn't take long for him to get hard. She propped herself as she slid his dick inside of her cavern.

Lincoln squirmed when his dick entered her cavern. Without any time to spare, Chloe gyrated her hips to Lincoln. "Does my pussy feel good?"

He shook his head as he whimper. "It does. It does, Chloe."

"That is right, Lincoln. God, I love dominating you. God, you don't know how much you make me feel," screamed Chloe. "I love you."

Lincoln felt his dick getting harder when those words came out of her lips. "You love me?"

She blushed while displaying frustration. "Shut up and forget what I have said. Just make me come." She thrusted harder with his dick. "And that is an order, my pet."

Lincoln grabbed her ass and started thrusting his hips faster which made her let out a cry. He felt his dick touching her special spot, as if she had a womb.

"Yes, right there, Lincoln. Right there."

"I am about to come, Chloe."

"Do it, Lincoln. Come inside me. Make me pregnant with your child."

"I am coming, Chloe."

"I love you, Lincoln!"

Lincoln cried as he spurted his seed inside of her. His dick twitched, releasing every content into her cavern. She felt the hotness of his seeds entering the confines of her stomach. She let out a loud sigh. She kept her eyes on Lincoln, ensuring that he watched her ebb into the pleasure.

She allowed his dick to stay until his erection subsided. She pulled herself from his dick, climbing over to where he was lying. She pressed her head on his chest, making circles and dots with her fingers.

"Hey, dog," said Chloe.

"Yeah," questioned Lincoln.

"Where is my kiss," she asked demandingly.

Lincoln pressed forward to kiss the Queen Trap. She closed her eyes to accept his kiss. If Lincoln would have paid attention, he would have noticed the tears escaping from her eyes.

About thirty minutes later, Chloe and Lincoln were back in their regular attire. What Lincoln didn't know was that she kept a bag outside of the front porch. She put her cosplay clothes in the bag along with the wig. She took Lincoln's clothes and put them in there as well.

"I will be trusting you that you will wear with me at the convention," she told him. "Understand, you dog."

Lincoln smiled. "I love you, too, Chloe."

"Fuck off," she scoffed. "I was caught up in the moment. You don't know what you have…." Lincoln came and kissed her once more. She paused, displaying her blushing before hitting Lincoln on the shoulder.

"You still can't be honest," said Lincoln.

"Whatever!" She grabbed her things and headed for the door. "Later, loser." Lincoln waved Chloe goodbye as she left his bedroom. When he closed the door, Chloe stared at it. She closed her eyes and kissed the door.

"I love you, okay? I love you. I love you. I love you. No one in the world is that precious to me like you, stupid Lincoln," she said quietly as she made her way downstairs.

* * *

A few moments later, Lincoln stepped out of the bedroom to go to the bathroom. After the events he had, he didn't mind a shower. Meanwhile, while Lincoln was in the shower, something was stirring from under the bed.

Miki rolled from under the bed. She was wearing only her panties. She was covered in sweat and her panties were also soaked.

She looked to the bed where she heard her beloved Lincoln having sex with the Queen Trap. Her eyes were gleaming. "That tramp doesn't deserve my Lincoln," she said as she was licking the contents from the bed. "His cum soaked sheets is what I need at this time." She smeared her face into the sheets until she heard the door opened.

"Miki," questioned Lincoln.

"Lincoln," said Miki in a startled tone.

The reaction caused Lincoln to drop his towel, exposing his nakedness to the married woman. Miki released a smile. She reached for the curtains to pull them down. She then walked past Lincoln to close the door before locking it. She approached Lincoln from behind, grabbing his dick. "This mistress wants to play too."

Lincoln shook his head, but couldn't help but to smile. "Are you alone?"

Miki shook her head in disagreement, pointing to the floor. Lincoln saw the waving hands of Haruka under the bed.

Lincoln made a mental note to stop by the convenient store to purchase an energy drink for he was going to have a long day.

"Alright, girls," he said. "Do what thou wilt!"


	7. Lincoln Does ASMR (And It Goes Wrong)

_**This particular chapter of Now Matter How I Look At It, It's Still You Girls' Fault is written by [thegirlfriendoftheauthor]. He doesn't know that I am writing this chapter. So, keep this between us. This particular chapter focuses on Lucy. He doesn't do enough Lucy like he used to. Lucy is one of my favorites. So, why not let me do this chapter. It doesn't matter for there is no correlation to the real story. Enjoy!**_

* * *

It was nearly ten in the evening when Lincoln made it to his bedroom. He widely stretched his arms when catching sight of his bed. The bed itself became appealing to him, liking it was calling his name. It had been a long day for him. Earlier that day, he and his sisters were thrilled with the announcement when notified that they were going to have a snow day. Living in the midwest, snow was second nature to the family of thirteen. However, when there is abundance, opportunities and the family was going to take advantage.

Granted, it was almost ruined by his sister, Lisa's fallible mood. Nevertheless, she too managed to have a great time. Well, a little too much fun. And part of that was the reason of his exhaustion. Just for assurance of not having a Lisa-filled experience with machinery and snow, he grabbed what he had need to ensure that he won't be returning downstairs anymore for the night.

With his plate of peanut butter and sauerkraut sandwich in one hand and his newest manga on his bed, he was going to conclude the night right.

After partaking on his bedtime snack, he rested on the bed to read his manga. It was another manga of _The World God Only Knows_. Although the manga and the anime had concluded, Lincoln was new to series. Catching up with the latest on Keima, his harem, and the mystical adventures of demons and spirits, he knew that this edition was going to be good.

He was halfway through the book when he had heard a knock on the door.

His eyes quickly darted to the door. At first, he was alert; fearing that it may have been Lisa strategically planning another overboard attack on snow. His bones were already sore from the constant pounding of the frozen liquid. He knew another one was more than he could bear.

He decided to play coy by remaining silent. He hoped that maybe if he was quiet, then maybe the person would go away.

 _Tap, tap, tap._

The knocking continued. Apparently that didn't work, he thought. He decided to play sleep again. He lied in bed hoping that the knocking would stop. But it didn't.

 _Tap, tap, tap._

 _Tap, tap, tap._

 _TAP, TAP, TAP._

 _TAP, TAP, TAP._

Ignored with the unbearable knocking, he got out of bed and headed for the door. If it was Lisa, he thought, he was going to give her a piece of his mind. And a plea of surrender and mercy.

As he approached the door, the knocking stopped. He took his hand off of the knob. _Maybe she gave up_ , he thought.

"Whoa! That's a relief," he told himself. "I thought for sure that was going to stop."

"What was going to stop," said the voice.

He yelped, jumping to the wall. Coming from under his bed was none other than his younger sister, Lucy. She displayed her grin, dusting herself off and sitting at the foot of the bed. "I can see why they hide under your bed. You have plenty of space." She looked over to her brother. "Since you are doing anything, maybe you can help me out."

He sighed. "And does it require me to do this at this hour?"

She displayed her eyes. "Yes, big brother. I need you to tame this darkness within." She came closer. "And to protect you from the others." She reached under the bed and retrieved her arrow gun. His eyes widened.

"Right now, cycles are synchronized and many of them are pissed," she said bluntly. "So, look at me as protection for the night." She grabbed Lincoln and pressed his face to her buxom. "Free the heartbeat of my undead heart, big brother. My darkness needs to be tamed. Please, help me, big brother."

Lincoln sighed heavily at the request his sister asked him to do. At least, out of the many girls of the harem, she was the easiest to deal with.

He got from the bed and went into his drawer. Inside, he pulled out shaving cream, a razor, and a towel. "Ok, Luce. Pull up your skirt and remove your underwear."

"Yes, my white knight," she answered. Lucy removed her underwear and placed it on the floor. Lincoln assisted her with her skirt. It amazed Lincoln on how much his teenage sister can produce much hair in her vaginal region.

He poured the shaving cream on his hand. He gently applied it to her vagina. She shivered. "That tickles, Lincoln!"

"Please, Luce. Don't make this any awkward than it should be," he replied.

Lucy laughed quietly as he applied more shaving cream to her regions. Unlike the other girls of the harem, Lucy's pleasure is enjoying getting shaved by her brother. She wasn't ready for sex and didn't feel that sex was a way to acquire her brother's love. So, this shaving session was enough to get her fill of her brother until she felt she was ready to have sex. Plus, she was enjoying the sensual moment and the embarrassment he became each time they do it.

"Fetching, big brother," she said flatly. "You know the drill. Not a word as you remove my impurities." She let out a smile. "Make sure you cover all ground this time. I don't want to see any remnants."

Lincoln shook his head as he put the razor onto her vagina. Lucy tilted her head, basking in the moment as the sound of the razor was making contact with her skin. She looked at it as therapeutic. Lincoln was careful to not nick her. When he was finished with one area, he applied a wet towel. She flinched when making the contact.

"You are such a natural at this, big brother," she said. "It is like ASMR or something." She rubbed his hair. "I give you permission to speak. Does it feel good taking care of your sister."

"It doesn't matter how I feel for as long as I serve you," replied Lincoln.

"Sigh! You are catching on very well," said Lucy. "Please continue."

As he lifted Lucy's butt to continue the other side, he saw something coming from his window. Hovering over the roof was the lecherous Nurse Kazami. The perverted nurse displayed anger. She pointed her eyes directly at Lincoln.

 _I don't think I have to explain what I am going to do to you. Don't you?_

Lincoln shook his head as he continued shaving Lucy. He stopped when he heard some commotion from outside.

 _Nurse Kazami, why in the hell are you in front of our house?_

 _Fuck you, you fucking skank. You already know the deal. Like you have to guest, Lynn._

 _I thought I told your fucking ass to stay away from this property._

 _Well, my property is on your property. He is mine._

 _You wish, you perverted, stupid bitch!_

It wasn't over. He heard his familiar lesbian neighbors joining in on the action.

 _You twats wish Lincoln was your man. He is our man. Our property._

 _Fuck you, Miki. I should report your ass to the news for inappropriate relationship with a teenager._

 _Fuck you, Susan Kazami. You are mad because we reported you for trying to take Lincoln across state lines._

 _You are just mad that I have thought of it first._

 _All of you bitches need to leave my property before I call the cops on all three of y'all._

 _Stay in a child's place. Let the women settle this, you brat._

 _Brat, Mrs. Haruka? I will show you a fucking brat._

Lincoln was panicking when hearing the commotion. As he was about to make the decision to go out there, he felt the grip of Lucy. "Shh! Continue your job. I got it!"

"But, Luce!"

"Are you testing me, Linc?"

"No, ma'am."

"Thank you. Know quell my impurities, my white knight."

A few moments later, Lincoln heard the sounds of water sprinklers coming from the yard. The sounds of the girls screaming as they left the scene. It wasn't long until everything was silent.

"I think I am ready to take our relationship to the next level, big brother," she said teasingly. "I hope you weren't planning to sleep tonight."

 _Ay! Ya! Yi! I need a new author, a new agent, or something. This harem is driving me crazy with these crazy stunts._


	8. Willow vs Rosario Vampire (Part I)

_**This Now Matter How I Look At, It's Still You Girls' Fault is written by [thegirlfriendoftheauthor]. Boyfriend needed a day off. He told me I could write this story.**_

It was a Friday evening when Lincoln returned home from spending the latter part of the afternoon at the arcade. His craving of Pac-Man fever caused him, Clyde, and Ronnie Anne to venture the arcade. It was his treat and the friends didn't mind. It wasn't everyday he had time these days with the pair. Since Clyde was attending a private high school and Ronnie Anne has since moved to Chicago, it wasn't easy penciling his childhood friends from their busy schedules. He left the duo after their usual street corner, promising them that they would get together tomorrow before Ronnie Anne returned home that Sunday.

They made pinky swears and they were on their way to their respective destinations. He entered the home with feeling of relief. He could relax his aching feet and go to his room to catch up on his manga. Aside from having Pac-Man fever, he was suffering from his insufficient days of reading _Rosario Vampire._ Although the series has long since ended, but it entered his life after reading an article on the Fandom website. Alongside with _Hellsing_ and _Vampire Hunter D_ , _Rosario Vampire_ was the first of his choice.

He tiptoed up the stairs. The girls were in their respective bedrooms, but he didn't want anything to notice that a certain white-haired boy was lurking in the mist. Anyone suspecting him would have been liable to catch him on sight, doing what they wanted until they felt they were done with him. And he knew that ten out of ten, they were never finished. It made him think of a certain _RWBY_ fanfiction story he was reading. He couldn't recall the title, but the unrelenting Yang and Blake on Jaune made him feel for him. He didn't want to think about the craziness of Weiss. He promoted empathy, because the story was fictitious. This was real as it can get for the white-haired child when he made it to safe territory, his bedroom.

He closed the door, securing the lock before wiping his forehead with relief. He dropped his bookbag, throwing it in the closet. He exchanged his street clothes in exchange of his plain orange t-shirt and a pair of white gym shorts. He put on his slippers and made his way to his desk. He reached for the first volume of the _Rosario Vampire_ manga. Before making his way to his bed, he went to his mini-fridge for a can of soda and a snack cake.

With the necessary tools ready for his nightly reading, he was ready to commence the weekend; sinking his teeth into the world of Tsukune, Moka, Kurumu, and the many others in their misadventures of love, adventure, chaos, and mishaps that they called a harem, much similar to what he was facing right now.

He flipped the pages, being entranced by the graphics, the plot, the scenery. He took his time, capturing every detail to the point where he can recognize an erased portion or a slight error. As a future mangaka, he wanted to pinpoint those kinds of things when making manga.

His heart fluttered when seeing both inner and outer Moka. Something about her beauty captivated the white-haired child. A strange combination of sweetness and bitterness of the two yearned Lincoln for Moka. She was a powerful person, in many ways than one. Her sweetness appealed many to her. She was kind, always lending a helping hand to those who wanted it. He smiled when seeing her chasing after Tsukune when he wanted to return home. Friendship was key with Moka, which made him crush on the fictional character. The other side of Moka was sex appeal. Her cockiness, her attitude drew Lincoln on how much she couldn't care for Tsukune. However, knowing the tricks and trades of manga, she was a classical tsundere, or at least that was his opinion. The more he thought about Moka, the more he felt an arousal from his dick.

He paused, citing that the manga was fictitious. A girl like Moka was impossible. The vampire that he knew was never close to Maka. Moka was compassionate. Willow was unrelenting. Moka was the girl next door. Willow was the girl he wanted to avoid. Granted, the latter he was a hypocrite. He didn't hate Willow. He cared for her sincerely and unconditionally. He just wished that the queen of the night wasn't as aggressive or too domineering.

He stopped reading. He opted not to further compare a cartoon character to a real vampire. But still, he thought to himself, it would be nice if Willow displayed a gentler side.

As he placed the book on his bed, he heard a tap at the window. He slightly turned as the devil herself was in front of him.

"Good evening, darling," said the queen of the night. "I am here for you."

She hovered into the night. Her eyes, glowing as the moon, to alert her blood doll. Lincoln put his finger to her, alerting her to get him a moment. He got from the bed and turned out the light. He returned to his bed where he opened the window. She just into the room, landing softly on his bed. He closed the window. Willow was in a kneeling position. She let out her bedeviling smile, letting Lincoln know of her presence into the night.

"Here I am, my love," said Willow. "I am ready for another encounter." She let out a haughty laugh. "You have been on my mind, my precious blood doll. A day without you is like a day without sunshine."

Lincoln nodded his head, as he reached for his shoes that were on the floor. "Hey, Willow. If it is okay with you. Can we take it easy tonight? I am not asking for much. I just want a easy night."

Willow put her finger to her lip. "What's the matter, darling?" Her canines shined into the night. The moon didn't help display her fangs, along with her candid beauty. "I am not being rough on you. I am not hurting you in any way?" She furrowed her eyebrows. "Is there some skank who have plans for you. Is that the reason why you want me to take it easy?"

Lincoln shook his head. "No, ma'am. It is not. It is just I want to relax, Willow." He looked away. "I am not asking for much." He sighed. "Willow, doesn't hurt to just cuddle or relax with me. Does the sex always have to be rough?"

Willow came from behind, covering her cape around Lincoln. She put her nose around his neck, grabbing his hips. "Your aura. It smells different." She grabbed him tightly. "There is another." She sniffed him. "Outside of the bunch that I am aware of." She grabbed him tightly. "Tell me who she is, now!"

Lincoln let out a slight groan. "Willow, there is no other. Beside the other girls that you know, there isn't any."

"Then, why the apprehension," she barked. "In all fairness, I am still soft on what I do to you than other people in my past, my blood doll."

"Do you care about me?"

"Why would you ask such a thing?"

"Answer the question."

"Yes, yes I do."

"Then, let me have this request. And like I said, I didn't say no. I just want you to be easy."

Willow loosened her grip. She was backing away when she put her hands on something. She eyed the source. She saw the _Rosario Vampire_ manga on the bed. She grabbed the manga, opening the pages. " _Rosario Vampire_ ," she said. "I am quite familiar with the manga." She scanned a few pages. "Haiku reads this and every now and again, I check out. That Tsukune guy is such a puny weakling. I must admit that Moka is a beautiful creature. However, I can't stand her outer self. I am much of a fan of inner self. She is a real definition of a vampire!"

"Moka is cool in both ways," retorted Lincoln. "She is able to balance out her sweet and bitter side. They play each other well. That is why I like her."

"Blood doll, darling, as much as you wonder, us vampires aren't we call sweet," said Willow. "We have intentions that defines us on who we are: to feed, to breed, to make ourselves known."

"Well," interjected Lincoln. "I don't think all vampires are like that. I think there is good in some vampire." He looked to Willow. "The fact you spared me that day must show that there is some good in you. I know I am just more than just blood and flesh to you."

Willow blushed, looking away from Lincoln. "Yes, it is true. Y-Y-Y-you are more than that. I call you a blood doll. You are precious to me."

"In what way," said Lincoln.

"In what way," retorted Willow.

"Yes," confirmed Lincoln. "Am I precious as myself or a blood source?"

She was flustered, grabbing the sheets on the bed. "Why you are asking me these kinds of questions? Do you know who you are talking to?"

He blushed nervously. "No, ma'am. I wasn't trying to be smart."

"Good! See to you that you don't ever again!"

"Yes, ma'am."

Willow chuckled as she returned to his grasp. She laughed as she took off his clothes. She, too, went into her nakedness. The rest of the evening was spent on ravishing sex. The room was filled with moans, groans, screams. She sank her teeth into the blood child as she was filling his dick within her. She sucked his blood, forcing him to say her name as he climaxed inside of her. When they were finished, she put his head on her breast. He continued panting until he fell asleep.

While Lincoln slept, Willow stared at the ceiling. She was thinking of the things she said to Lincoln. She bit her lip, knowing that the words she told him was out of defensiveness. Deep within, the queen of the night wanted to express her true feelings. She rubbed his forehead before kissing it.

 _Do you think it is easy, my blood doll? Us vampires are a prideful bunch. Displaying our feelings is weakness. As much as I am a bitch, Lincoln, I sincerely do care about you. And more than just a blood source, my dear. I mean, more than just sex. I love you. There are many times I just want to say that we are lovers. I love you, Lincoln. If you only understand._

With a few hours before she had to depart, she looked at _Rosario Vampire_ to kill some time. She continued observing the deuteragonist, Moka. She looked at her features, studied her personality. She looked at herself, rubbing her hair. She returned her looks to Lincoln.

"I think I might take what you said into consideration," she said to Lincoln. She got from the bed. She put on her clothes. She gave Lincoln a final kiss before disappearing into the night.

 _ **Willow has developed compassion!? Find out in the upcoming chapters!**_

* * *

Somewhere in a certain dorm room at the Beacon Academy, Nora Valkyrie was lying in bed reading fanfiction through a scroll. With a plate of pancakes next to her bed, she had enough to keep herself busy for the time being.

"This Lincoln character is interesting," said Nora while smiling. She took a piece of a pancake, inhaling the contents in her mouth. "He is so sweet. Well, not like my pancakes. That alone is reserved for Jaune. Next to pancakes, that is the sweetest of cakes."

She closed her scroll, deciding that she had read enough fanfiction for the day. It was the weekend and she had some time on her hands. She knew that Jaune wasn't available for another hour. The blonde was working with his sparring partner, Pyrrha.

"That damn bimbo slut," scoffed Nora. "The nerve of her putting her hands on my man. Can't stand that bitch. The nerve of her." She took deep breaths, telling herself to calm down. She knew that being part of Team JNPR was top priority and she didn't need distractions. She pushed the doors of the dorm and made her way out of the open.

She couldn't take her mind from reading the Loud House fanfiction. Something about seeing Lincoln submit to other women turned her on. Just the thought of dominating a boy was making her moist. She licked her lips, licking the residue of syrup, though there was another kind of syrup she wouldn't mind tasting.

She paused when seeing the members of Team RWBY passing by. She gave the girls a hidden glare. "Everyone of them is suspect," she said. "No way in hell are you guys going to take my Jauney. Speaking of Jauney, where in the hell is he." She gripped her fist. "If that whore…"

She paused, seeing the members of Team RWBY passing through. She waved to each of them. As they left, she stuck her tongue out while lowering her eyelids with her finger. "Damn harlots!" She smiled when spotting Juane leaving the building. She saw Lie Ren following behind. She frowned when seeing Pyrrha coming behind them. Her eyes became fiery when she saw Pyrrha putting her hands on Juane's shoulder.

"That. Bitch. Is. So. Fucking. Dead!" Nora thought of some of the things the girls of Lincoln's harem did to protect their man. "Jauney, please be ready when I am going to have my way with you. And Pyrrha, please prepare to fucking suffer. Either support me and my Jauney or die for your pride. That sweet pancake is mine!"

 _ **To be continued. As for the latter part of the chapter, I think you got an idea on what is coming soon. This story has been written by [thegirlfriendoftheauthor].**_


	9. I Need Shin Chan's Writer For This Story

_**Lincoln writes a blog and tries to help Willow with technology.**_

 _Hey, guys. Lincoln, here. I have been deciding rather or not to discuss my latest escapades with the girls of this harem. Lately, I have facing a lot of ridicule from my readers regarding the amount of girls contained in my harem. Shame on you! Of course, there are fifteen girls. Why not? I can't help myself of my gentle nature. That's who I am. I am too friendly of a guy to turn down those amounts of women. No matter the tiredness, the pain, the stress, the amount of crazy, debauch sex. There is love in it, too. I mean, not everyone of my random moments is that bad. For instance, I helped Willow on buying a smartphone._

 _So, we are at an ATT store. Thank God that there was actually a store that opens later into the night. Anyway, before we entered, Willow shields herself with her cape. She hisses loudly, which in return gave us so stares._

" _What foolery thou art do, blood doll," questioned Willow. She has a habit of returning to Old English when something that is very, very foreign scares her. She even did it at the Redbox the first time, but she is starting to warm up better. On the third attempt, she was able to type in the movie. However, it failed when it needed her credit card information. She went postal and caused another Redbox machine to be destroyed._

 _Let me stop, I will explain that story another time._

 _I calm my nerves, giving her my hand for support. "Let me explain, Willow," I said to her. "I know your way of reaching me is to either grab me without notice or asking Haiku to send for me. Is it about time we catch you up with the times?"_

 _She puffed her cheeks, putting her hands on her hips. The fiery look in her eyes as she swayed her hair displayed that she wasn't in a good mood. Gives me a feel of how Moka from Rosario Vampire looks when she gets pissed off (when she removes the rosary). Speaking of which, Willow has been watching the anime lately and is really enjoying it. So much so, she wants to try some roleplay when she finishes season one._

 _Anyway, getting off task. Let me continue with the story._

" _You don't think I can handle being without it," she asked me. "Are you calling me out, blood doll?"_

" _No, no," I explained to her calmly, yet in a nervous tone. "I just think you shouldn't be afraid of trying something new. You shouldn't be afraid of technology."_

" _I am not afraid," she retorted, stopping her foot. "I can go on the line. I have a credit card. I can do certain things."_

" _You can," I replied. "If it wasn't for the help of Haiku."_

 _I knew she wanted to ravish me on the spot for the tone that I was giving her. However, I had a trump card. "Remember on my birthday that I get one free thing from you?"_

" _Yeah," she said, but in a tone of having instant amnesia. "I think I have said that."_

" _Well, I remember." I cough, reading the contract that I have her made for me just in case she would have forgotten. "I, Willow, the queen of the night, the woman of a thousand young, being of sound mind and undead spirit promises Lincoln Loud one day off from being ravished, attacked, "raped," bitten in any kind of nature without his permission. If I don't uphold to this agreement, then I will have to take a week off from everything with him. Signed and dictated, Willow Akhmadov, esq."_

 _I need to make a mental note as she finally revealed her last name to me. Yet again, like her real name, it may not be real. Anyway, back to the story._

 _She blew through her nose. She was really acting like a stubborn child. "Damn, I did say that, did I?"_

 _I smiled. "You sure did!" Still holding her hand, I take her to the store. It wasn't easy as she dragged her feet as we entered the phone store._

 _There wasn't as many people. Thank God. Some would look at us and ask if we were mother and son. Or is there a medieval fair to attend? Cosplay convention? Regardless, many people don't say that. I think it is a insecurity for she doesn't like dressing in conventional clothing. Willow still doesn't like wearing modern clothing. She doesn't even care for pants._

 _I think I should have changed my birthday wish. Ok, on our one year anniversary, I want to take Willow shopping and see her in some jeans. Don't know why, I think she would look cute._

 _Willow acted like I have taken her to an execution by the way she saw the building surrounded by phones, tablets, laptops, and the like. She was showing shyness. Once again, that was a side of Willow that I only get to see. I knew I was going to get it eventually. However, seeing her vulnerable side is worth it._

" _Excuse me, lady and gentleman." I turned as I saw the sales associate displayed his usual demeanor of welcoming us to the store. "Thank you for visiting ATT. How can I be of service today."_

" _Good evening," I tell the sales associate. I have to pause on what I have to say next. Using the word friend isn't conventional with Willow. We have past that part of no return. I could say colleague, then that wouldn't make sense. Willow gave me the look as I knew what she was thinking. I took in a breath before returning to the associate. "My governess here is looking for a cell phone."_

 _Good show, Lincoln, I thought to myself. I am not ready to say the G-word yet._

" _Great," replied the sales associate, which I don't remember his name. So, let's call him Larry. "I can help you with the wide selection of phones available here." Larry turned to Willow. "What kind of phone interests you miss?"_

" _The name is Willow," she said flatly. I snapped my finger. I wanted her to be much nicer, for me, at least. "I am sorry." The tone was a little rough. "You can call me Willow. I am here because I want a phone that can make just calls." I felt her teeth gritting and grinding. It wasn't easy being nice._

" _Well, I can show you some smartphones that has simple capabilities. Maybe a flip phone. Much of our older, well, elderly used that," said Larry._

" _Are you calling me old, boy," questioned Willow. I bumped her arm with my shoulder. Her eyes were changing colors._

" _Excuse us for a sec," I told the sales associate before turning to talk to my crazy, yandere mistress of the night. "Willow, you have to learn how to get along with people."_

" _The bastard called me old," said Willow._

" _No, he didn't. He wanted to know if you felt comfortable using a phone since you wanted something simple," I told Willow. I leaned and whispered. "Be careful how you throw that word, boy. You know that's a man, right?"_

" _Relax, my blood doll," interjected Willow. "My daughter's father was black. Well, part black. He was also Asian."_

 _That was not near the direction I was going at. And I am not opening those can of worms. I have worms I haven't finished consuming yet. I ignored the latter half of the conversation and turned back to the sales associate._

" _Show us a basic flip phone to start," I told him._

" _This is a Motorola Razr," mentioned Larry. "Although over ten years of age, it still has capabilities for the basic needs." He gave me the phone. I checked the features for a moment. It looked suitable for Willow to use._

 _I turn to Willow. "Check this out and see what you think."_

 _WIllow took the phone. I had to help her put the screen to her ear because well, you know, you know nevermind. I helped her show her the basics._

" _These apps lead you to your gallery, your pictures, your contacts. The camera is outdated, but you can take pictures," I told Willow._

" _This even has a calculator," mentioned Willow. "An alarm clock too. So, I don't have to have Haiku waking me up at a certain time?"_

" _Yep, this phone can help with all of the needs to catch up in the 21st century," I explained to her._

" _Well, if this what you want me to have, then I will take it," mentioned Willow. She turned to Larry. "Fetch me the order so we can take our leave." I elbowed her shoulder again. She grinned her teeth. "Please, sir. I would like to have, have this phone to take home, sir, kind, sir." She turned her eyes back on me as the sales associate took his leave. "When these 24 hours are up."_

 _I nodded my head. "I know. I know. My neck and my body is ready."_

" _Damn right it will be, blood doll," she spat. She then turned and did something that was surprising. "Thanks for helping me."_

 _I was blindsided with that. Willow made a compliment and meant it? I let out a smile when noticing that._

" _What," she said. "What is so funny?"_

 _I kissed her on the cheek. "Willow, you are one interesting creature to be around."_

 _She blushed, but turned away from the embarrassment._

 _We purchased her phone and we were on our way out. I will have to say that the trip to the phone store was a success._

 _Unfortunately, the night didn't end there. Ten minutes after leaving the phone store, she wanted to go to a Redbox and celebrate. We were able to get the process successfully, but the movie was sold out._

 _An off-duty cop saw her. There was an altercation. The cop couldn't stand a chance. The cop car was destroyed._

 _Don't worry, well for more of Willow than myself, I have the copy of the videotape._

 _As a vampire and a woman of her word, she didn't rape me that night. She spent the night in the basement where she kept her slaves. I pretend to not to notice them as the fact that I am in a relationship with a yandere vampiress._

 _Well, that is the end of my blog. As we speak, Haiku is holding the tablet for me as she was typing this story. I am hanging in the air as we speak. Restraints are crazy, but I am used to it. Willow is now naked and has a belt in her hand. Baby oil is now being applied to belt. Next to me is a table where she keeps her instruments of our nights. She is definitely going to let me have it tonight._

 _Well, that is my blog. I hope you learned something about technology, vampires._

 _No, no. Let's just call a Random Moment in the life of LIncoln. Enjoy life, ladies and gentleman, even if those moments of random._

 _ **You tried your best, Lincoln. Maybe next time, you should check out instead. Like math, 2+2 always equal 4.**_

* * *

Ash Ketchum was sitting in his bedroom as he finished reading the blog that Serena texted him about. Serena has began following this blogger by the name of Lincoln Loud. According to Serena, she enjoyed the antics and the misadventures of Lincoln Loud. His content is refreshing, humorous, and enjoyable. Ash read Lincoln's latest blog. He, too, couldn't help but enjoyed the misadventures the poor white-haired child was going through.

"Well, that's quite refreshing," mentioned Ash as he turned off his laptop. "I wonder if Mom made anything for supper yet. I am quite starved."

Pikachu was sleeping on Ash's bed. He decided to leave the electric mouse alone as he put on his slippers and head out into the hallway.

He made his way to the hallway and saw something that nearly made him fall to his knees.

He saw his mother sitting in the living room. However, she wasn't wearing any clothes. She wasn't alone. He saw a redhead spiky haired woman who served as his nemesis. She, too, was also naked.

"Mom," cried Ash. "Why is Jessie doing here?" He paused. "No, wait. Why are you naked? No, wait. Why is Jessie? No, wait? Why are you both naked?"

Delia Ketchum smiled at the nervousness of her son. Jessie already stood as she prepared to get what she wanted when she decided to make a visit to the Ketchum home.

"Ash, dear," said Delia. "Jessie and I were talking and she said some things that were meaningful to me." She stood as she walked to her son. Jessie, already ahead, stepped behind the stunned Ash. He felt her breast touching his back. Her erect nipples aroused the young Pokemon trainer. "She mentioned that she wanted to make a truce with you. To unite, or at least a stalemate for now."

Delia leaned forward, tilting her son's chin. "And I couldn't agree with her any more."

Meanwhile outside of the Ketchum residence, Serena, Misty, Dawn, May, and Brock were outside watching the scene. Brock had a video camera on a tripod, filming the scene.

"This is great," mentioned Brock. "Seeing Mom X Enemy action is sexy." He turned to the ladies. "So, if I film you guys having sex with Ash after they finished, you promised me a night with Nurse Joy or Officer Jenny?"

Misty rubbed the back of her head. "Sure, Brock. As promised."

May and Dawn looked at each other, releasing a slight laugh.

"Should we tell Brock that Nurse Joy and Officer Jenny are actually hiding in Ash's utility closet getting off to them," questioned May.

Dawn shook her head in disagreement. "Let the man dream. Let's be honest. We all know why we are here. One reason and one reason alone."

Serena pouted. "No fair, I want to have my way with Ash by myself."

Misty leaned her chin on Serena. "Don't worry. We will all have our time. Thanks to you with introducing us to the _Random Stories,_ I can't get enough of it. Like the girls in that harem, I want a fill of Ash."

The girls stared while releasing alluring smiles at each other. They were all thinking the same thing.

"I want that boy!"

 _ **Until next time ladies and gentleman. As for the latter part of the chapter, I think you guys know where I am going with this. Enjoy life, even if those moments are random.**_


	10. Rita and Lincoln Watch Anime

_**This random side story was written by yours truly and co-written by [thegirlfriendoftheauthor].**_

It was Lincoln's decision to watch an anime. He remembered Nory's suggestion of _Fullmetal Alchemist_ to be a great anime for his viewing pleasure. Opting more for romantic comedies in the anime genre, but he didn't mind giving this a try. It was the least she could do after hurting his anus after their "lesbian" encounter. He crossed his legs as Netflix provided what he needed to watch the anime. He opted for the 2003 series of the show and was in the process of watching. As he clicked on his PS4 controller to select the program, his mother came with another load of fresh laundry.

She was humming a tune as she put the laundry on his dresser. She turned to the lying Lincoln as he put the anime on pause.

"Getting ready for bed," questioned Rita as she put his clothes into the drawer. "You know it is sort of early of you." She winked. She looked to the television and narrowed her eyes alluringly. "Is that a sexy program. What do you call it? A hentai?" She bawled her fist and swayed it like a kitten. "Meow, meow, Linky," she told her son in a flirting manner.

"No, Mom," he scoffed. "Not everything I look at is going to be porn or hentai." He buried his face in the pillow. "And besides, I don't have any of that anyway. You guys give me enough action that I wouldn't have any needs to masturbate."

She giggled covering his mouth. "Aww, poor, poor Linky." She finished putting the clothes in his drawer. She put the laundry basket into his closet. Lincoln kept the anime on pause until she had left the room. Luckily, his father was home. It was the first in a few days since he has returned from his business trip. He was sleeping peacefully in his bedroom. The additional box he carried on his return speculated Lincoln of souvenirs. He hoped that it was the _Death Note's_ L Funko novelty toy he wanted. The novelty toy of the infamous character eating cake. He crossed his finger in hopes that was the souvenir his father brought.

As he thought of other toys to add to his collection, Rita walked to the door and closed it, locking it. Before Lincoln could spit a vowel or a consonant, she put his finger to his lips. "Don't worry, dear. Your father is severely worn out from his business trip. The sleeping medication I have given him is enough for a 747 engine to crash into our home and he still wouldn't wake up." She giggled, crawling into Lincoln's bed. Lincoln sat on top of the covers whereas she was taking off her socks and her pants. She was already wearing a t-shirt, so the rest of her was in her t-shirt and panties. She locked eyes with Lincoln, waiting on his next move.

"So, Linky dear. What are _we_ watching," she said as she patted the bed, urging the nervous Lincoln to get beside his mother.

" _Fullmetal Alchemist_ ," answered Lincoln as he nervously got into the position beside his mother. She assisted him with his clothing. She took his shirt, displaying his undershirt. She proceeded in pulling down his pants. She tossed them to the side.

"Now we are comfy," she said while smiling. "So, this _Fullmetal Alchemist_. Is it good?"

"Unsure," said Lincoln while shrugging his shoulders. "A friend of mine recommended it for me. Said that it was an anime that can put me into an emotional rollercoaster of excitement, adventure, discovery, sadness, and hope."

She nodded her head. "Whatever the program, I just want to have a movie night with my son." She leaned over him, kissing his shoulder. She continued kissing his shoulder, leading to his neck. She made a slight lick to his neck, making Lincoln shiver.

"Mom, Mom, Mom," said Lincoln. He knew his erection would protest him, but he wanted a night without sex. At least, not for the moment. "Mom, if you are going to be in here, then I just want to make a solid rule."

Rita paused. She returned to her composure, surprised to hear the firmness in his voice. "Yes, dear?"

"Can we just watch the show without any form of sexual pleasure," questioned Lincoln. "I will lie with you. I can sit on your lap. I just want to watch the show with my mom. Is that fine with you?" He went quiet in his voice. "With respect, please, Mom."

She rubbed his forehead. "Of course, dear. Anything for you."

"Thank you, Mom." He pecked her on the cheek. "Thank you for understand." _At least for now._

"No problem, baby," said Rita as she kissed him on the cheek. _You will have to fall asleep at some point. Then, dear old mother dearest would serenade you with a lullaby. Tee hee!_

Lincoln and Rita watched _Fullmetal Alchemist_ while snacking on popcorn and drinking soda. Rita wasn't really fond of anime, but didn't mind watching it with Lincoln. Honestly, she could see how attached many were to the genre for the graphics, the plots, the character development, and the emotions that draw the audience. She watched a sense in which she nearly teared up. Watching Shou Tucker turning his daughter into a chimera. The moment she passed away made Rita grip the covers. She began sniffling, making Lincoln turn,

"Are you okay, Mom," questioned Lincoln.

"I am fine," sniffled his mother. "Why would that bastard turn his daughter? For the name of science? Then that other bastard treating Edward like he isn't shit?" She wiped the snot from her nose with her sleeve. "I can see why you kids like this. This is like my soaps."

"Mom, not even your soaps come close to this," interjected Lincoln while snickering. "I am surprised that you are getting caught up into this. It's only fiction."

She coughed, covering her mouth. "Still, this is too much. You can too deep into the characters. It makes me cry."

"Never get too attached is what I believe," said Lincoln. "If you have watched some other animes, then you will be bawling your eyes out." He rubbed his mother's back. "She was a minor character. That how it plays out, Mom. So, relax. Hopefully, some other episodes can overthink that particular scene away." Lincoln clicked on the next episode of the series.

The mother and son were on their tenth episode of the series. Lincoln was lying on Rita's chest. Rita wasn't stunned, yet alone aroused to see her son resting on her chest. His hot breath was hovering over a nipple, making them erect. She kept her composure for Lincoln was still awake. She noticed the shift in heartbeat when seeing the cat burglar, Psiren, in a compromising position with the protagonist, Edward.

Rita furrowed her eyebrows. _I hope Lincoln isn't developing feelings for that animated thieving whore. I may not have my skinny figure back in the day, but I have yet hear LIncoln complain._ She placed her hand on Lincoln's shoulder, rubbing it gently.

"That's nice, Mom," mentioned Lincoln as he began yawning. He began laughing as he saw how Psiren was cajoling and fooling the Elric brothers repeatedly. "Too bad the boys are falling for such charms. I must say for an anime character, she is attractive."

If there was a background noise of glass breaking, it suited for Rita when she grabbed the controller and put it on pause. Lincoln got up from her chest. "What's the matter, Mom?"

Rita pushed Lincoln to his side of the bed. She got on top of him. The sweat and musk filled his nostrils. Despite his resistance, his erection was standing at attention. "You are finding that thief attractive, Lincoln?" Lincoln saw the water flowing from her eyes. If this were an anime, waterworks would shoot to the roof.

She grabbed Lincoln's dick, rubbing it gently. "Lincoln, do you want someone to dress like Psiren, baby?"

Lincoln's breath labored, feeling his erection leaking precum.

"Answer the question. Do you want me to dress like Psiren?"

"Where is this coming from?"

"Answer the question, Lincoln."

"If it makes you better, then yes, please."

"Good boy!" She stopped. She saw the wet spot leaking from his underwear. She smiled. She went back to the image of Psiren and left it on the screen. "Now imagine me wearing that outfit for that is what I am going to get for us." She continued rubbing. "Because you took so long, the punishment is to come in your pants."

Lincoln groaned as her gentle hands glided his dick. He knew he was close to climax. "Don't fight it, Linky."

Lincoln grunted as he felt his dick spurting milk in his underwear. She continued stroking until his orgasm ceased. She collected the residue and placed it in her mouth. "Meow," she purred to Lincoln. She stretched out her panties, preparing for more. "Kitty wants more cream," she purred. Lincoln closed his eyes as he felt his mother entering him.

As she going crazy in ecstasy, he did imagine his mother cosplaying as Psiren. _She wouldn't be bad for the look. I won't let her know about it._

* * *

 ** _Meanwhile in a parellel universe..._**

Edward yelped loudly as he realized that he was lying in his bed. It was quiet, seeing rain dripping down his windowpane. He checked the other side to see his brother, Al. However, the bed was empty. He forgot that Al went with May on a special mission.

Edward return to his pillow, still reeling in the strange dream he had. He thought of the deceased Nina Tucker. It brought a tear to his eye for that was the one girl he couldn't save. Despite her father getting justice, it wasn't enough. He wanted to be responsible for his justice. Even for a moment, he wished he could revive the bastard so he could personally kill him. Better yet torture him until death.

 _I want to strangle that son of a bitch. And after he stops breathing. Karate!_

Edward felt the hand of another person rubbing his face.

"What's the matter, sweetheart?"

Ed saw the tender, sweet blonde that he was glad to call his wife, Winry. She yawned cutely, kissing him at his chest.

"Nothing dear. Just go to sleep."

"Is everything alright sweetheart?"

He leaned to the other side and saw another blonde lying beside him. Despite their differences, they got along from time to time. RIza Hawkeye kissed his shoulder tenderly, carefully not messing with his mechanic arm.

"I am good, Riza. Just get some rest."

"Are you still having those dreams again? About Nina," questioned Riza.

"No, I am not," answered Ed. "Just other things."

"What other things?"

Ed raised the covers and saw the cat burglar, Psiren, kissing on his stomach. The blonde laughed, kissing further down until she made it to his third leg.

"I have been having these dreams," said Ed. "Dreams from another dimension of something. As if we were part of a universe designed by some author."

"What do you mean," asked Psiren.

"Like a boy named Lincoln Loud. He is from a place called Michigan in America, I think," mentioned Ed. "He has a harem with bunch of girls that are nearly driving him nuts or they are nuts. Just weird. They are so boxy and stuff. I don't know what to say about it."

"I think you have been practicing your alchemy too much," said Winry as she kissed his hand. She looked at the other girls. "I don't about you guys, but I am in the mood to cheer him up."

"I couldn't agree any more," said Riza.

"Way ahead of you," mentioned Psiren while winking.

Ed closed his eyes as he allowed the women to do their will.

 _Yeah, yeah. A dream. Maybe a dream._

Meanwhile, from the heavens above, there were a certain group of people watching the tirade in progress.

"Mother Elric," said the young child known as Nina. "What is big brother doing with those women?"

"Cover your eyes, dear," said Ed's mother. "Young eyes shouldn't see that."

"Yes, ma'am."

Trisha Elric frowned as she saw her son being taken advantage by those women.

 _The nerve of those blonde bimbos. Knowing that it took me alone to raise him and my dear Al. They take the benefits and I get nothing. They risked their lives trying to revive me. I must find a way to descend down to Earth. I will be damned if some blonde whores take advantage of my son. That is reserved for me. As for Al, I have other special plans for him._

"Take a number, sis."

Trisha told Nina to go along and play with her dog as she turned to talk to another person who had barely made it to the golden gates, Dante.

"I, too, would like to go back down and relive the moments," said Dante. "Though I must say your son is quite a catch."

Trisha puffed her cheeks when hearing Dante said something about Ed.

"I am sorry," said Dante. "Look, I want to go down there. You want a chance with Ed right?"

"I do," said Trisha. "Both of my sons."

"Let's see if we can arrange that," said Dante while laughing.

Both Dante and Trisha saw Nina staring at them.

"What is it, little one," asked Trisha.

Nina opened her mouth, releasing a voice that belonged to a teenager. They watched as her appearance transformed into a tall and long brown haired beauty.

"I want in as well," she said while smiling. "I want to see my brothers."

"Then that settles it," said Trisha.

Dante snapped her fingers. "Once I talk to the main man here, we are heading back to Earth."

"How can we," asked Nina. "Especially if we are dead."

"Must we forget that we are holy spirits," said Dante grinning. "We can make it happen. Watch me work." _I don't know about you guys but Al and Roy have been on my mind. And I don't mean I have to sleep with them to see some action. Tee hee!_

 _ **Hope you guys enjoyed this particular random side stories. It is safe to say where I am going with the latter half of the story. This particular half was written by [thegirlfriendoftheauthor].**_


	11. White, Blonde, Red, and Pink

It was Throwback Night at the cinema. A weekly event where the theatre dedicates the history of cinema by delivering their moviegoers some classic movies. Tonight was Asian Cinema at Throwback Night. Movies such as _Battle Royale, The Wailing,_ and _Breakup Buddies_ were the starring attractions. Lincoln stood at the center of the theatre, counting the amount of cash he had in hand for the theatre. The cost of admission was the isn't, but the person who was breaking the bank for it.

"Linky, dear, can I buy the largest popcorn available? I promise that we can share more than just a few kernels." The brunette smiled, holding her arms in her back like a shy, nervous schoolgirl. She wasn't a shy. She wasn't nervous. Although a teenager, she wasn't a girly girl. This mud-in-your-teeth kind of girl was nothing more than his older sister, Lynn. Lynn still smelled like sweat, despite coming home from roller derby practice to change into an oversized t-shirt and a thigh high shorts. She borrowed tennis shoes that belonged to Luan. The perfume she was wearing belonged to Lucy when she started hanging out with his other friend's younger brother. Lynn was out of place. Especially when he had told the tomboy whimsically earlier that day that he had a spare ticket to the movies.

Before Lincoln could give out the coordinates or the time, Lynn immediately rushed from practice to their home. He didn't need proof for she had a live broadcast on social media. "Rushing Home to Hang with My Kid Bro" was the title as she cruised and perused the Royal Woods suburb to get to her brother. In her defense, she was the least recognized girl in his harem. He prayed that she wasn't itching for this night compared to the other girls of this harem. For the first time, Willow couldn't have an encounter for she had to take Haiku potion shopping and that required her to leave the area at the dead of night. She wasn't going to find the potions she wanted in particular in Michigan. It was going to require a trip back to her native England.

So, that was five days of freedom from being a blood doll. His liquid platinum can remain in his neck for now. Although, Willow made orders to keep her liquid gold stored in his cage until she returned. She wanted enough of it to fill her bank that it would require an expenditure of another account, whatever metaphor it meant according to Lincoln.

Nory was unavailable as well. Nory had to leave town to go on a trip with her grandmother. She groaned loudly earlier in class about her untimely departure. At the end of class, Nory pushed her lips into his ear, speaking words he refused to repeat. The confirmation was cleared when she took him to the biology lab where they were attempting to make a specimen of their own.

He knew Nurse Kazuko had date with her husband. Tomoko was recovering from their previous endeavor. Lincoln wouldn't go into detail, but it involved the both of them using a double-ended dildo, a pair of pliers, and a blowtorch. The worst of his damage was some burned hair. He didn't care for it needed shaving anyway. Miki and Haruka were out of town visiting their daughter; Ms. DiMartino was watching Chloe for she was on punishment after catching her and Lincoln having sex in bed a few nights ago (The former had sex with him that night after sending Chloe to bed); the Loud sisters were doing their own thing (much to their chagrin for not being with Lincoln); Sam was in Atlantic City with her father and stepfather; and his mother was spending the evening with his father on their date night.

With all of the vacancies of his harem, Lynn finally had an opportunity to be with her white-haired brother.

She pressed on her brother's shoulder with her chin. "Can I get the large popcorn with extra, extra butter?" She begged while pressing her teeth on his shoulder. "Can I also get the large drink as well?"

"Sure, Lynn," replied Lincoln as he counted his funds. He knew he wouldn't be broke for long. As much money he has earned as rewards for his encounters, he could be a professional sugar baby. A title he refused to accept. Clyde made it as a joke one afternoon. Despite being receptive of strong humor, he told Penelope that he saw Chloe and Clyde behind the bleachers playing "Hide and Go Get It." Clyde was sent to the doghouse. Chloe and Clyde were behind the bleachers truthfully. However, Clyde was making a trade with the _Final Fantasy_ videogames. He was starting to suspect that Chloe was a closeted otaku.

While Lynn went to get her snacks, Lincoln made the executive decision of watching _Battle Royale._ The 2000 Japanese dystopian film stumbled into Lincoln's life one evening when he had came home from school. His father was watching Netflix and Lincoln caught the scene with the antagonist Kazuo Kiriyama used a machine gun to blast two of his classmates. Lincoln's eyes widened when he wasn't finished with them. As a coup de grace, Kiriyama told the megaphone and put it over the dying woman's agonizing screams. When his pleasure of her suffering fulfilled, he used the machine gun to end her suffering. Immediately, Lincoln sat on the floor watching 15-year-old ninth graders go hand-to-hand combat with each other in order to win. That movie along prompted Lincoln to purchase the book and the manga.

Admittedly, he spent a few nights masturbating over the character of Mitsuko Souma. He didn't have a cold-hearted girl in his harem similar to the character; though Willow came at the closest. He knew that Chloe had a high sex drive, but it didn't compare to the sex appeal of Mitsuko Souma. She was more than a sex symbol to Lincoln, she was a tortured soul. She used her sexuality to gain power, respect, and control. She was domineering woman, an outcast; caught in the fray in order to survive in a cruel city that didn't offer her a fair chance. Lincoln had to stop focusing on her after he began developing an erection.

He entered the theatre, got his tickets punched. An older teenage worker winked at Lincoln, writing her digits on the ticket. She even gave him access code on her private Twitter. He blushed, putting the ticket in his pocket so that he didn't want Lynn to see that.

With her popcorn and drinks in her hand, they were ready to go to the theatre. As he entered the hallway to find his movie, a certain pinkette was walking with another woman. She was blonde and reminded Lincoln with someone of power. They were holding hands. The pinkette was blushing. The woman saw that and took advantage by slapping his butt.

* * *

"Mom," cried the pinkette. "We are in the public eye."

The woman nudged more to the pinkette. "Don't worry, sweetheart. No one knows what we are." She chuckled as she gripped on his butt more. Lincoln blushed as he realized that this couple were more than just a couple.

The pinkette noticed, turning away toward his mother. "Mom, there are people watching."

The blonde returned the glance at Lincoln. By that time, Lincoln was a few feet past them. She also scanned Lynn that was coming through.

"I wouldn't even be afraid," replied the blonde. "For they, too, are brother and sister." She sniffed loudly. "I can smell the passionate incest towards them too." She winked at the pinkette. "Especially the white-haired child."

"Mother, how can you tell," questioned the pinkette, displaying worry that his mother might have something planned for the unsuspecting couple.

"A witch knows these things," replied the blonde witch. "It takes more than popcorn, hormones, and black blood to pinpoint these things." Her smirk grew wider, spreading from ear to ear. "I think you and that boy could get along fine. I can see much subtlety in him as I see it in you." She turned around, grabbing her son. "C'mon, I want to check them out. See if they are really what I think they are."

"But, mother," cried the pinkette.

"Oh, quit your bellyaching, Crona," replied the blonde witch. "Medusa is now curious about this pair. Who knows how this experience may fall." She pecked her son on the cheek. "As much I enjoy our lovemaking." She gripped his ass once more. "I am kinda interested in an experiment." She gripped Crona's hand. "Let's go."

* * *

Lincoln held the door to enter the theatre. Lynn thanked Lincoln for his being a gentleman. She kissed him on the cheek, making him blush. The pair walked up the aisle until they were in the front of the room. There were plenty of fans who wanted to watch the action-packed film.

"Jesus Christ," said Lynn while whistling. "So many people here for an old flick?"

"Hey," interjected Lincoln. "That old flick is also responsible for inspiring _Hunger Games._ It deserves credit where it is due."

Lynn spat. "Whatever. _Hunger Games_ sucked anyway."

Lincoln wasn't going to entertain Lynn's negativity in quality movies. She motioned to Lincoln that the front row had an open spot. Lincoln followed Lynn as they were taking their seat. He excused himself as past a few girls who blushed or winked at Lincoln. As Lincoln past through, their eyes focused on another boy who sat in between them. If Lincoln didn't know better, but he thought he saw the boy holding something that reminded him of Pikachu.

The theatre seats were comfortable. They were getting themselves situated as the room dimmed and the movies were going into previews. Lynn turned off her cell phone and Lincoln put his phone on vibrate.

"Why didn't you turn your phone off," questioned Lynn while raising her eyebrows.

"You can think _The Dark Knight_ for that," answered Lincoln. Unbeknownst to the tomboy, Willow supplied Lincoln with a pocketknife. However, this pocketknife contained enough energy that Willow could sense it the moment it was used. It was blessed with potions and it wasn't easy to acquire. It didn't require much. Just another night of wall-slamming, grabbing-gravel-with-your-knees sex. The usual evening for the white-haired child.

* * *

Meanwhile, the pinkette and the blonde witch found seats a few rows from Lincoln and Lynn. Medusa wanted to observe. She wanted to be certain that her hypothesis was correct. Crona looked nervous, knowing that his mother was up to something.

"Mother, we shouldn't do this," pleaded Crona. "We are already out the grid. We are not even near Nevada..." His pleading turned into quiet moans as he felt the gentle touch of his mother touching his dick through his cloak.

"Shh," whispered Medusa. "This tends to pacify your nervousness."

He tucked his teeth in, trying not to alert others of their lasciviousness act.

"See how I massage it gently that it makes you feel good," questioned Medusa in a light whisper. "Now let this blonde witch take care of this while you relax and tend to feeling good. Okay?"

"Yes, mother," moaned Crona.

* * *

The program began. Lynn took an elementary Japanese class to understand the basics, but she still didn't like subtitles. The thought of following along with words and paying attention to scenes confused the tomboy. Nevertheless, she counted it as a strategy as she was competitive in sports. She wasn't going to let a foreign movie stop having a good time with her brother.

Lynn watched Lincoln. She stared as he was eating his popcorn. She spotted the scene when Mitsuko came out of nowhere with the gun and starting shooting at her classmates. Lynn grinned a little, knowing of the character's inexperience of using weapons. Lynn was also a great marksman. Something she didn't really tell people about. She kept it a secret from her parents and her sisters, with the exception of Lincoln. He discovered her making rounds one afternoon in the park with a pellet gun. She compared her goals to her womb. "Just like my pellet gun and your dick, it won't miss."

"The movie is so crazy," she whispered to her brother. "These kids are going out there to get the top spot. They are around our age."

Lincoln nodded. Lynn loved when Lincoln enjoys something. It gave her joy that there was some innocence left in him. Lynn leaned and placed her head on his shoulder. Lincoln flinched, but didn't move. He allowed his sister free reign on his head.

She kissed him on the cheek. "I love you, Lincoln." She kissed his neck following his ear. Lincoln was holding onto the popcorn as his sister was kissing him.

"Lynn," he whispered.

"Shh," she retorted. "Nobody we know is here. Also, we can't talk in the theatre, silly bro." She let out a slight chuckle. "Keep the popcorn covered please." She slid her hand under the popcorn bucket. "It is dark and no one can see us. If you keep quiet, you will feel good things."

"Lynn, this isn't a good time," pleaded Lincoln.

"Never is a good time unless you are around," replied Lynn. She licked under his ear. "When we are alone, we aren't brother and sister. _**You are my man.**_ " Lynn unzipped Lincoln's pants. He felt her surprisingly soft hands touching his phallus. "I am going to make you mine, Lincoln Loud," she purred as she began playing with his dick.

* * *

Medusa licked her lips, knowing that it confirmed her hypothesis and knowing that her son was climaxing through his cloak. It left the both of them a satisfied look.

"Well, my work here is done," said Medusa. She pulled her hand from Crona's now softened member. She licked any remnants of his spunk. She patted him on his shoulder. "Let's go."

Crona and Medusa stepped out of the theatre. They were walking toward the exit hand-in-hand.

"Crona," said the blonde witch.

"Yes, mother," asked the pinkette.

"I think I want to stay here for just a bit," replied the blonde witch. She came and pressed her lips to his. It was quick, but it left the pinkette blushing. "If you don't mind, dear?"

"Sure, whatever you want to do," answered the pinkette.

"Good," she smiled. "I want to conduct some research on the white-haired child. I am quite curious to see what kind of fish I can catch with him?" She turned to Crona. "Don't worry, I am not into him if that is what you are thinking. However, he does gather my interest." She and Crona were stepping into the parking lot.

"I am curious on what energy can that boy bring if we involve others," she said. "I want to see what I can to see if my experiment can work."

"Why him," questioned Crona.

"One, I wouldn't use you," she replied while caressing his cheek. "You are for my exclusive use only. Two, he has strong powers. And I want to know more about it. So, arrange some things to bring our stuff to Michigan. We might as well get our hiking boots and jackets."

"Yes, mother," replied the pinkette.

"However, I am not too much in a hurry," said the blonde witch. "There is a lovely hotel a few blocks away and I have an extra swimsuit and some lingerie I refuse to go to waste." She winked.

"Yes, mother," replied the pinkette.

Crona knew of the night he was going to have, but he also knew what kind of adventure the white-haired child was going to have. He even knew that the white-haired child was involved for he sensed it, but like his mother. She loved involving things that shouldn't involve her. But the pinkette couldn't help for the love of his mother. He let out a smile as they were heading toward the hotel.

 ** _What plans does Medusa and Crona have for Lincoln? To be or (not be) continued. Unsure, but interesting to see._**

* * *

Ai Sunakawa sat on the stool at the theatre as she was bored and was ready to go home. It has only been a few weeks since her arrival to the United States. She took the job at the cinema to help her earn some funds as she was studying abroad at the University of Michigan at Dearborn. She originally wanted to study fashion, but the schools she wanted weren't available. She took the first school that allowed her entry into the States. Living in the Midwest wasn't Japan, but she was happy and it was calming.

Her setup wasn't bad. She continued getting updates from her brother, Makoto and his friends, Rinko Yamato and Takeo Goda. It disheartened her that the gentle giant was with Rinko, but she learned to accept it. She still communicated with them along with her college friends. She even made acquaintances while moving to Detroit. However, she didn't mind having a boyfriend to fill her day. She even settled to have friends with benefits, which should be above her. However, she was a young adult and she had needs. Despite her beauty, kindheartedness, and compassion, she was still human.

She couldn't take her mind off of the white-haired child that entered the theatre earlier. It was on impulse, but she gave him the number with the hopes of his answering it. Her private Twitter didn't have any nudity. She used it as a prompt to show her modeling and hopefully, her compromised positions could entice the boy to make a call.

She yawned as she saw the boy leave the theatre. She eyed him as he was walking into the bathroom. She knew it was now or never. She excused herself to go to the restroom herself. She swallowed her pride and she waited by the entrance to get in contact with the white-haired child.

Just like her brother's best friend, Ai Sunakawa wanted a love story of her own.

 ** _Lincoln's harem to his side story grows? To those who complain about that can freely get a tanto knife and commit and seppuku. Just kidding, would you imagine? Enjoy the Random Side Stories!_**


	12. A Date With Destiny (Health Inspector!)

**_This story is written by yours truly and co-written by [thegirlfriendoftheauthor]. This story was random as ever and don't know why we wrote it, but we did. Enjoy!_**

It was Saturday afternoon as Lincoln was in the kitchen. He was in the middle of making a grilled cheese sandwich with jelly and a side salad. The latter of which was to add some nutrients to his system since he had felt he had been gaining some weight. A benefit of being in a harem was the endless supply of love and food were steadily entering his pallet. He wasn't a fan of hip hop, but he was listening to Rae Sremmurd's "No Flex Zone." Granted the debut single of the Atlanta hip-hop came out years ago, but Lincoln admired its catchiness and its upbeat. He tried grooving to the song, but unfortunately, the white-haired child didn't have rhythm. Nevertheless, he continued dancing to the beat, despite the occasional laughter from his younger siblings.

When hearing the phone rang, he stopped his awkward dancing and went to the counter to pick up the phone. He still find it interesting that he was probably one of the few residents in Royal Woods to have a home phone. He picked it on the third ring.

"Good afternoon, my precious blood doll," purred the woman on the other end. Lincoln already knew the sultry, deep feminine voice was nothing more than the queen of the night, Willow.

"Afternoon, Willow," answered Lincoln as he flipped over the bread for it to toast. He was walking to the table while carrying him a glass of water. "I am amazed to call me at this hour. Let alone how in the world do you have my house number."

"Never mind the small stuff," interjected Willow snappingly. "A vampiress knows your scent, your everything, my dear. Let's be clear about that. Speaking of knowing everything, if Miki ever pulls that stunt of sneaking under your bed with that trap bitch again, then there is hell to pay."

"How in the heck did you…" He paused, not wanting to further elaborate. "So, what's the stitch?"

"I have a favor to ask of you. This is something that I really don't like to do, let alone think of it," she said with a bit of hesitance in her voice. "I couldn't sleep because the vampire council informed me with some terrible news."

"What do you mean "terrible," questioned Lincoln as he was displaying concern. "Is it some bad?"

"Yes," exclaimed Willow. "Even worse than Redbox."

"What could be worse than Redbox?"

"There is a leader from the Sapporo chapter coming to America tomorrow. The leader of my council advised me that he needs my assistance in something very, very dire," explained Willow. She took a breath before sighing loudly. "He wants me to babysit the leader's daughter."

Lincoln paused, trying to hold his laughter. "He wants you to babysit." Lincoln burst out grinning that he heard the snorting from the other end of the receiver. "You, a babysitter? Is that really it? Wow, Willow, you really had me for a minute."

There was a brief pause in the conversation.

"Lincoln, honey, blood doll," she said gently. "Let's not underestimate on who you are talking to, my dear. Do you want a repeat of the other night?"

Lincoln gripped the phone tightly on the incident that occured the other night with Willow. Recently, he and Willow purchased the video game, _The Legend of Zelda: The Breath of the Wild_. The intent was the pair could share and work together on levels. Their promise that they wouldn't make any progression on the game until both parties were present.

Willow nearly went postal when she discovered the Lincoln progressed in the game by four quests. She was stunned, frustrated. She kept a calm demeanor as she walked to Lincoln's door and securely locked. She was very calm turning off the lights. She was really calm as she instructed him to sit on his bed.

She was very calm as she ravished him in sex. Once she was finished, she spanked him and bit him on both sides of his neck and a bite to his butt. Following that, she returned to having sex with him. Once that was done, she cast a spell on him to give him blue balls.

As of now, Lincoln gripped his shorts as the spell was still in effect.

"Quiet, aren't you," questioned Willow. "Good because you can listen. The council is going to have a meeting with the representatives of the Midwest and Northeastern United States chapters with the England, Japan, and Nigeria chapters. The leader of my council saw me fit to be a good watcher, so here I am playing babysitter." She took a breath. "I need your help on taking care of the little brat."

"When is she coming again?"

"Tomorrow!"

"Ok," said Lincoln. "You have said a mouthful earlier, by the way. What's the kid's name?"

"Well, she isn't really a kid. She is actually near a hundred. But, she has the appearance and personality of a teenager. Her name is Anju." Lincoln could hear Willow getting adjusted around her coffin she used when she wanted some sleep. "Her father, Henry Maaka is from the Sapporo clan and is a very prominent figure in the council."

Lincoln wasn't as familiar with the council for he shouldn't be aware as he was a familiar to them. However, he was familiar with the surname, Maaka.

"Question, this Anju Maaka wouldn't have a sister, would she?"

"Yeah, she does."

"That particular sister wouldn't be named Karin, wouldn't it?"

"Yeah, she does."

"Her brother wouldn't be Ren, too, right?"

"Yeah. That is his name. Wait a minute, why do…."

Lincoln hang up the phone. Sweat vacated his pores when hearing the name Anju Maaka. The smell of burning smoke alerted him of his grilled cheese sandwich burning on the skillet. He ran to the stove to grab the skillet. He put it in the sink and apply water to the burning dish. Seeing the black made Lincoln shiver.

"I know exactly how you feel, my friend," said Lincoln. He picked up the phone and decided to call Clyde. He answered on the second ring.

"Hey, Lincoln, what's going on," asked Clyde.

"Dude! Anju is coming back to town!"

Lincoln heard Clyde's breath panting.

"I...I...I thought she was gone for good. I thought she moved away. Are you sure this is the Anju?"

"Dude, yes! The one with Karin. The one with her bad ass brother, Ren. That Anju!"

"Oh my, God," said Clyde worriedly. "We're dead! We're dead!"

"Let's be calm, Clyde," explained Lincoln. "There is no need to panic. There is no need to run or hide or scream. Clyde, WE'RE DEAD!"

"Ok, ok! Let's me think," explained Clyde as Lincoln heard him scrambled through some papers. "Wait, Willow! Maybe if she could…"

"Dude, this is Willow! A yandere vampire! If she knows or finds out what Anju did with us, she is going to murder me," exclaimed Lincoln. "And Christ knows what rampage she is going to do with those in her wake!"

There was a brief silence. Lincoln could hear Clyde talking to himself. "Ok, when is she coming?"

"Tomorrow."

"Well, there is one thing we can do until then," said Clyde.

"What can we do?"

Lincoln heard Boyz II Men's "It's So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday" in the background. Lincoln shook his head as he knew that they didn't have any ideas about their situation with Anju.

Lincoln hang up the phone and sat at the kitchen table. He groaned at the thought of Anju's return.

 _Linky, Clyde, wanna play a game?_

 _You must bow before your god, my servants._

 _You know I get a kick in watching you two lovelies kiss. Why not give it a try._

 _I command you to take one end of my sheath. Clyde, the other._

 _You can't run from me, Linky!_

 _Clyde, where is my dark chocolate. Can't hide from me forever._

 _Let's play an adult game that our mommies and daddies do!_

 _Boys, boys, it will be fun. I promise not to bite you, not that hard!_

 _No matter how it looks, I am coming back for you Clyde and Linky. You two are mine!_

As he put his head down, the phone rang again. He picked it up.

"Hello," asked Lincoln.

" _ **Bitch,**_ did you just hang up on-"

Lincoln hang up on Willow the second time.

 _Willow is pissed. I am so dead!_

This wasn't how he had planned his day. He retrieved his cell phone and looked at his calendar. He knew his nights were going to be filled with the wrath of Willow and the "love" of Anju.

He texted Haiku that a floral service was to be expected to give Willow a dozen of black roses, which were her favorite. He knew it wasn't enough, but it would soften the blow until her arrival to get him.

 _ **So Willow wasn't the first vampire that Lincoln encountered? Well, we will have to see where this is going?**_

* * *

Ken Masters have dealt with many challenges in his career. He knew he wasn't perfect, but he did the best he could to live on the right path. He made a promise to his wife, Eliza that he was going to do one more score with Ryu and that was going to be the end of his criminal past.

He was arrested after being caught in an undercover sting of selling unregistered machine guns, which violated his probation for his previous arrest in selling toy guns to wealthy businessmen. Ryu was released on his bail. Ken had bail opportunity, but forgo for he didn't want to put anything of his and his wife's as collateral.

In his mind, it was cheaper to stay in jail than to pay that debt. It was the weekend when he got arrested and he wasn't going to see a lawyer until the following Monday.

For the time being, Ken had to sit still.

He was standing in the shower along with his cohorts/cellmates bathing. Ken wasn't phased as he was used to being around male company/nudity during his fighting days. He took his mind off of the matter as he continued bathing. Well, his mind wasn't totally off as he knew he had a tail.

He and this particular tail have a history.

He kept close as he knew that that tail was watching. He had the very right to be hesitant for the tail wasn't afraid to express their prowess.

Ken begin shaking until he lost the grip of his soap.

Ken felt his stomach drop as the soap landed on the ground. The response was met with jeers and cheers.

 _Oh, yeah, baby!_

 _Did I just hear something?_

 _Feel sorry for that man!_

 _Things get lonely in here._

 _Oh, it's own now._

Ken knew that it was a matter of time before his tail would make an appearance. He felt the fear as the soap landed at the drain.

"Your soap drop, baby!"

The tail was right behind Ken.

He turned as he saw the tail. The tail displayed an appearance as a girl and identified as a girl. She had long, rough pink hair. She was beautiful, fetching, very attractive. Despite being a beauty, she was one of the most feared in the prison.

Poison had it out for Ken and now it was her opportunity to make her move.

"I said your soap drop, baby," she grinned while holding her hands behind her back. Ken turned and saw another girl behind Poison. She and Poison were friends on the outside. She also went by the name of Roxy. And just like Poison, he had a history with Roxy. She kept silent as Poison was plotting her next move.

"Do you think you are going to leave it down there," questioned Poison.

Ken remained quiet, still feeling the warm water hitting his skin, among other things.

"You know we don't waste any soap in here, baby," said Poison.

"I...I...I am finished," answered Ken.

Poison shook her head in disappointment. She motioned to Roxy to keep Ken from leaving the area. "No, no, baby," she told Ken with certainty in her voice. "You are not finished. I have been watching you."

"You have," questioned Ken.

"You didn't wash behind your ears or nothing."

"But I did!"

"Look at me, sweetness," explained Poison as she displayed her body. Ken watched how plump her breasts was. She had a tone stomach. His stomach groaned when seeing the very thing that made her be at the male institution. Her dick stood hard and at attention. The precum displaying its hunger for Ken. "Do you see how I am all clean, glistening, and all? That is hygiene, baby!"

Roxy purred as she put her hands on Ken's shoulder. "You can call us the health inspectors!"

"Now, Ken, be a dear and pick up the soap," said Poison. "Or else, we will make things harder on you." She winked.

Ken knew he had the ability to fight, but when it came to those girls, there was a weakness he couldn't understand. He saw the soap lying on the drain. He knew regardless of his options, he wasn't on any good end. He silently prayed to God as he kneeled to retrieve the soap.

 _Pray, baby, pray!_

 _I'm next!_

* * *

Ai Sunakawa screamed into the night as she looked around her surroundings. She saw that she was lying in her bedroom. She saw rain dripping down from the window. She tried calming herself down as she was surprised by the nightmare that she had.

 _Why would Ken allow Poison and Roxy to attack him? He has the moves of kicking their asses. I am sort of thinking he wanted to be taken advantaged? I am not sure. I have to quit eating light at night._

She removed her covers as she went to her dresser to find her sleeping medication. She had a full day in the morning and didn't want nothing to deter her from her studies. As she reach for the medication, she smiled as she looked at the piece of paper on the dresser.

It had Lincoln's number on the paper and a message.

 _You seem cool! Let's hang out sometime._

 _Lincoln_

Ai held on to the paper as if it was her true love. She then kised it before putting it down on the dresser. She said a small prayer before returning to sleep.

She was certain that she was going to have a love story of her own.

 ** _Question, oh fearless author? Will Ai have any interactions with Willow or what? Just want to sum it up so the fans won't get confused!_**

 ** _Oh, fearless [thegirlfriendoftheauthor], I don't know. Just relax and enjoy the story! I just want to have fun with these stories. I have already said it in the description. I just enjoy writing stories and having fun with my fans, if I do have any LOL. Just find out and watch! Thanks for reading!_**


	13. No Saturday Is Ordinary For Lincoln

_**Hey, guys, after nearly five months of hiatus, here is another side story. I do plan to return to the It's You Girls'Fault for These Random Moments soon. Enjoy!**_

 _ **[Chloe Molyneaux and Lincoln Loud are now connected on Messenger.]**_

 _[Chloe]: Whoa! The dog has enough funds for internet than getting Kibbles and Bits._

 _[Chloe]: What's the matter, you dog? Don't like when I make fun of the truth?_

 _[Chloe]: Why aren't you answering? Don't ignore me!_

 _[Lincoln]: That's because I am sitting right next to you, Chloe._

 _[Chloe]: I know that! Duh. I was just shocked on that your mother can afford the internet. I mean since you are piss poor._

 _[Lincoln]: Then, why are you lying on my piss poor bed in my piss poor room eating my mom's piss poor grilled cheese and jelly sandwiches?_

 _[Chloe]: It's important to know what it is like to walk a mile in the poor man's shoes._

 _[Lincoln]: Are we actually chatting like this. I am nearly five feet away._

 _[Chloe]: Don't wanna. I don't think you spend enough time on the internet. Time to get in touch with the 21st century. Also, your wattage on your internet provider. Also, why basic cable? If I see another lawyer commercial, then I am able to unload._

 _[Chloe]: Answer me, Lincoln._

 _[Lincoln]: Brb._

Lincoln leaves his laptop and heads for the restroom. He carries his phone so he can listen to music and browse on the internet while sitting on the toilet.

 _ **[Lincoln receives a Messenger notification from Luna Loud]**_

 _Hey, Linky. How are you, babe. Me and Sam are out and about. We were picking up some cute gear during our time together. Don't worry, regular clothes are included in this gear too. Just checking on you. Love you, Linky. Sam says hello and can't wait for our next alone time. She loves you, too._

Lincoln reads the messages, but doesn't respond. He scrolls on YouTube in search of animated comedy sketches. He tunes in the video clips of _Ghost Stories._

 _ **[Text message, Nurse Kazami, 3:12 PM]**_

 _[Nurse Kazami]: Hey, brat. Where are you?_

 _[Lincoln]: At home. It's Saturday._

 _[Nurse Kazami]: Doesn't mean I won't stop checking up on you. Reminding you of your weekly enema._

 _[Lincoln]: I thought it wasn't until Wednesday._

 _[Nurse Kazami]: Change my mind. Plus, I also got some organic, locally-sourced lube for afterward. Strawberry or Blueberry?_

 _[Lincoln]: Blueberry._

 _[Nurse Kazami]: Great! BTW, my hips are still sore. So, Tomoko is going use the strap on. So, be kind to your sissy. Have you spoken to her?_

 _[Lincoln]: Last night._

 _[Nurse Kazami]: Pay her a visit. She gets lonely. She craves you more than anything. And I am her mistress._

 _[LIncoln]: I will, but not now. Got company._

 _[Nurse Kazami]: It better not be some whore. Especially if it is that dyke Miki bitch._

 _[Lincoln]: It's no one. TTYL._

 _[Nurse Kazami]: Whatever. See you soon._

 _[Lincoln]: On second thought, strawberry._

 _[Nurse Kazami]: Is my little fluff ball coming around._

 _[Lincoln]: For my sissy. She likes strawberry._

 _[Nurse Kazami]: So do I, brat. See you soon!_

 _[Lincoln]: Yeah, see you._

Lincoln changes his mind on watching _Ghost Stories._ Instead, he decides to listen to Drake. _Scorpion_ recently came out. It is a good thing that he has YouTube Premium, thanks to his mother for the services he gives her. As he is browsing for the song that talks about his secret son, his phone receives a notification from his sister, Leni.

 _ **[Instant message, Twitter, lenilovesgood]**_

 _[Leni]: Linky! Linky! I miss you. I miss you like a retard misses the point._

Lincoln raises his head in the midst of confusion for in his mind, Leni proves a point within herself. He goes back to texting her.

 _[Lincoln]: Hey, sis. How's Aunt Ruth's?_

 _[Leni]: Better if you were tightly wrapped in my arms. Lori says hi btw._

 _[Lincoln]: Tell her hi. What's up, sis?_

 _ **[Chloe Molyneaux and Lincoln Loud are now connected on Messenger]**_

Lincoln texts Leni that he will talk to her later. He gets a little frustrated for Chloe is pestering him.

 _[Chloe]: Why are you taking so long in there? Are you choking your chicken?_

 _[Lincoln]: Can a man take a number 2 in peace? Can I have at least 5 minutes?_

 _[Chloe]: My mom called me. She and my dad just came back from Peru to see my grandmother. They stopped by this French antique store and purchased some fine china to send to me. You know how much I love the fancy things. Especially when it comes from Paris._

 _[Lincoln]: Hop off of France's dick._ _ **[He doesn't release the text. He deletes it]**_ _Cool! Whatever floats your boat._

 _[Chloe]: Seriously, I have dreams of going back to France. You know about my French ancestry, correct?_

 _[Lincoln]: Your last name, along with your Japanese and Peruvian. Of course!_

 _[Chloe]: Am I bugging you about something._

 _[Lincoln]: Ok, but being a person with some French ancestry, I am curious about the Japanese obsession with the French, let alone the fetishization between both cultures. Especially in anime._

 _[Chloe]: Their relationship deals with their history in war and with the military. That's why._

 _[Lincoln]: I agree with that. In fact, I don't mind. It is just I always see it everywhere. Especially to my face. Throw some color in there. C'mon, so many talented minorities that anime can offer. A perfect opportunity to make some serious measure._

 _[Chloe]: There are brown and dark people in anime._

 _[Lincoln]: Yeah, but is it characterized by race? Like black, Hispanic, Middle Eastern? Not want to start a war, but damn._

 _[Chloe]: So, they need some help on diversification. We are not perfect._

 _[Lincoln]: Tamaki from_ Ouran High School Club. _JoJo from_ Jojo's Bizzare Adventure. _Pony from_ My Hero Academia. _Foreigners with blonde hair and blue eyes. Once more I am not creating tension. I love all of the show, but we need to something if we are going to grow as people. At least there was Chad from_ Bleach _. I will love the day in which an anime can feature a strong, black or brown character without the caricature and stereotypes. You know what, I think I am going to make a comic._

 _[Chloe]: With what funds, dog?_

 _[Lincoln]: I was thinking about talking to you._

 _[Chloe]: What good will you be anyway? You're not a good drawer._

 _[Lincoln]: Says the girl I caught stroking herself on my bed to one of my comics._

 _[Chloe]: So!?_

 _[Lincoln]: You slay me, Chloe. Be back in a sec._

 _[Chloe]: Yeah, yeah. Since you are choking your chicken, I am going to take another grab of this sandwich._

 _ **[Lincoln Loud and Chloe Molyneaux are no longer connected on Messenger]**_

Before he can return to his music, he receives a phone call. It comes from an unknown number. He decides to answer it.

" _You have a collect call from the Michigan Juvenile Corrections for Women by the name of_ _ **Ronnie Anne Santiago**_ _. If you wish to accept the charges…_

 _ **[Call disconnected]**_

Lincoln finishes the toilet and heads to the hallway on his way to the kitchen. As he heads downstairs, he receives another phone call.

"Can a boy have one quiet Saturday," he says to himself with his chagrin. He saw it is Haiku. He answers the phone. "Hey, Haiku. What's up?"

"'Sup, Lincoln. I am at M'Lady Willow's manor and she is making arrangements to send you here tonight," she says casually.

"Can it be tomorrow night? I am trying to get the night off."

"Lincoln. You know that is not a good call for you," she tells him with a strong warning. "You know how Mistress gets when she hears the words, 'stop,' 'no,' or 'don't?'"

He scratches the back of his head timidly as he pours a glass of milk and looks in the fridge for another snack. "I know, Haiku, I know. I have the scratches and bites to prove her refusal."

"Please believe, Lincoln, but what Mistress wants Mistress gets."

"Can you do me _this_ favor, please?"

"Sigh! Okay! But promise me that we will go to the movies next Saturday."

"Can it be next Sunday. I promise Ai that we will go on that day?"

"Fine! And keep this as an outing between friends."

"Your words, not mine." He has his snacks and drinks ready to go upstairs. "What excuse will you make?"

" _ **That your presence will be needed tonight at this time, my blood doll.**_ "

He swallows the lump. "Willow?"

"Sweetness, child" she tells him calmly. "You know you don't want to disobey your mistress, don't you?"

He is startled, fearing that the vampiress is lurking around the corner. "So, Willow, I will be expecting you tonight?"

"Yes, love. And you know what you will face for your disobedience? And to have Haiku in this as well?"

"Yes, mistress. Sorry, mistress."

"Speak to you soon, love." She hangs up the phone.

As he approaches the living room, he sees Chloe coming downstairs. She doesn't look like she is in a good mood. She stamps on the final step. "You're boring me, dog! How can I be better than people when you are not here."

"Ever look for a mirror," he murmurs under his breath.

"What was that, dog?"

"Nothing."

"Good." She hits him on his shoulder.

"Ouch!"

"That's what you get." She gives him a slight peck on the cheek. "You got games right?"

Rubbing his tender shoulder, he nods to her.

"All right. You have a few minutes doing whatever you commoners do," she says before returning upstairs. The Queen Trap still keeps her eyes on him until she leaves his sight.

"Jesus," he says quietly. "I hope her parents put her on hormones quickly."

There is a bang at the front door. From the living room window, he sees his neighbor, Miki Tenoh-Anderson. "Linky, sweetie. I know you are in there. Let's play." A moment later, her wife, Haruka, was there behind her. "Linky, darling. We are in the mood for your loving. Let us in."

He releases a strong sigh. "Ladies, this isn't a good time."

He then receives a phone call coming from Nory. Suddenly, his messenger alerts Luan want to talk to him. His eyes widened when Miki and Haruka involuntarily invite themselves in.

Then, Chloe comes back down when seeing the girls. Her eyes furrows "Who the fuck are you?"

Miki grips her fist at the teen. "Who the fuck are you?"

"I asked you first."

"I asked you second."

"Why are you here?"

"Why are you here?"

"I asked you first!"

"I asked you second!"

Lincoln stands in the middle as a teenage girl and an adult are arguing with each other. He tries to diffuse the situation until Luna and Sam enter the room. Luna drops her guitar as she sees the very women that are vain of her existence.

"What in the hell are you doing here," she asks Haruka furiously.

"Coming for my man," she demands.

"You got a girl, bitch. Leave him alone," she tells her.

"You got a girl, _bitch._ Leave him alone." Haruka tells Luna with the sharpness in her tongue.

"You want to get waterboarded, bitch," barks Luna as she splits her guitar in two. She throws the other one to Sam. "I have been meaning to come over there and beat that ass, Haruka."

"Oh, you sly bitch Luna," says Haruka as she smiles. "Make my day. I fought bigger and worse foes in the old country. Fiends bow down before Sailor...I mean Haruka Tenoh!" She grips her fist, swaying her hand. "En guard."

"Let's dance," says Luna and Sam.

As the women are arguing and fighting over him, Lincoln takes his phone and leaves it on the counter. He takes his leave from the house and proceeds to walk. Where is going, he doesn't know. But he is certain it isn't going to be at home.

"Magnolia's sounds good right now," he says to himself. "Fern can keep me in the back for a while in case one of them shows up."

 _ **Lincoln, Lincoln, Lincoln. Even after this hiatus, you still have harem issues. Well, try again next time. To be continued….**_

Link snapped open his eyes. He wasn't sure how he was lying asleep in the abandoned shrine, but long enough to have candid and strange dreams. It was amazing to the eye, he thought. The fact of women of all range of ages was fighting over the white-haired teenager Lincoln.

It was a good thing that he didn't have to worry about that.

It wasn't long until he had to report to Hylian, but he was taking his time. The goddess didn't like his tardiness, but at the same time, she wanted him to be _fully_ prepared when she receives him.

As he sat up, he realized that he was still in Gerudo attire. The feeling of its silkiness aroused him, but he was trying to keep his composure. He had to remind himself of the position here.

"Umm, seems like our little Linky is awake." He saw Princess Zelda swaying her body, wearing the same attire as he. She returned where Link was resting.

She stroked his cheek. "I must say, Link," she said in her husky voice. "You were amazing last night."

"Last night," he questioned. "What do you mean?"

She covered her mouth. "Oh, crap! You weren't supposed to remember."

Link looked forward at Zelda as he noticed a familiar organ that he had as well. He raised his eyebrow. "Zelda, what happened last night."

She interjected. "Before you get upset, I did get permission from you. Plus, you are strong bottom when we make love." She winked. "Don't you feel anything?"

"Aside from my startled feelings, no. Nothing."

"Good! That's what I need to know." She took a breath. "Want a taste of what I gave you last night since I wasn't supposed to talk?"

"Did Sia give you something? Better yet Hylia?"

"Shh! It's not what I was given, but what passion it does."

He sighed. "Fine! But I will get a fill of you afterward."

"Of course, my Link. As always."

 _ **As for the latter part of the chapter, I think you got an idea on what is coming soon. This story has been written by [thegirlfriendoftheauthor] and big_diesel.**_


End file.
